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Here's Why Love Alone Isn’t Enough
Relationships will always have ups and downs and challenges over the years, but can love conquer all?
You can love your partner deeply and still be miserable in your relationship because your mental, emotional, or sexual needs are not being met.
You can love someone deeply but still choose not to be with them because sometimes love just isn’t enough. When elements are missing from your relationship, despite your love, you know it’s not going to work, and that it may be time to move on.
Reasons Why Love Isn’t Enough
Trust
It is very hard to continue on in a relationship once trust is lost. Trust is everything in a committed relationship, and without it you really have nothing. Unfortunately, your love will not make a cheating partner more faithful or honest. They are who they are and will only be true and trustworthy if it’s in their character.
Yes, people make mistakes, and sometimes forgiveness is warranted. Trust can be regained but it is a slow process, and much like a fractured bone it is forever fragile.
Communication
Poor communication is the cause of most fights and unhappiness in many relationships. Having a partner who is able to communicate their feelings, wants, and desires is extremely important. Just as important is a partner who is able to listen and receive what their partner is communicating to them.
Attraction
Call it shallow, but the reality is people want to feel attracted to their partner. Are looks the most important thing in a relationship? Of course not, but losing attraction for your partner, or even worse, feeling repulsed by them can mean the end of your happy union.
Commitment
Love is just a word without action behind it. A commitment is an obligation. A relationship commitment is an obligation of choice. We choose to be with that one person and we choose them again and again.
The problem is that sometimes the commitment feels like a burden, which is a sign that something is not working.
Determination
Once you are knee-deep into a relationship, with the honeymoon phase over, you have to want it to work to keep it going.
Relationships can be challenging, even hard at times. If you love someone and you want your relationship to work you have to be determined for that to happen.
Love alone will never be enough to sustain a healthy relationship when all or most of the key elements are missing. The important word being healthy. And remember that love will not make him change, and love does not hit, or use, or abuse. Love yourself first.
What are your thoughts on love alone being enough to keep going in a relationship when all the other elements appear to be missing? Please share your thoughts and experience!
"You can love them, forgive them, want good things for them ... but still move on without them." — Mandy Hale
Commitment Issues...6 Signs He's Doesn't Want To Settle Down (With You)
Not everyone necessarily wants to get married and have children, but most of us want companionship and someone to share our lives with. Sometimes finding the right one to spend your life will come easy, and other times you have to have several practice relationships to get it right.
Ideally, the man you decide to spend the rest of your life with feels the same way, but sometimes that just isn't the case. You fall madly in love with a man, and hope that he feels the same way, but your gut is telling you that something is off.
You have that nagging feeling in the back of your mind that he doesn't see you as his forever girl, and instead of listening to your gut, you push those negative thoughts away.
Sure, we would all love to live in la la land, and have our hearts desire dropping to one knee, declaring his love for us, and promising to love you and only you forever and always.
But meanwhile, back in reality, it doesn't always work out that way, and sometimes (wait for it) he's just not that into you. Here are the signs to look for in a guy who has no interest in committing to you.
Signs He Doesn't Want To Settle Down (With You)
He Avoids Discussing A future - I don't just mean he avoids discussing names for your future fictitious children. I am talking about he won't commit to being your date for your best friend's wedding in three months.
He Tells You
If he tells you he never wants to get married and doesn’t want kids, believe him, and do not waste your time trying to convince him he actually wants otherwise. Yes, it is possible that he is just young, or just not at that place in his life where he is even thinking about settling. But if you are in that "place" of wanting to get married and possibly start a family, you need to keep it moving.
He may change his mind, but maybe he won't. You are not at the same place in life. and it would be foolish to put your hopes and dreams on hold for someone who may never get to that "place".
He Wants To See Other People
He tells you he wants to see other people and encourages you to do the same. This is not a good sign at all. Not only is he telling you that he is keeping his options open, but he is also saying he doesn't even care if you are dating or sleeping with other guys. A man who doesn't want you all to himself, is a man who doesn't really want you.
He Doesn't Make You A Priority
Time with him is all about what is convenient for him. He sometimes makes you feel that he is doing you a favor by spending time with you, and doing things that are important or of interest to you. If you feel like you are not a priority to him, it is because you are not.
He Doesn’t Like Labels
You have been seeing him for months, yet you still have no idea if you are a couple or not. He introduces you as his friend, and when you ask him where things are going he deflects by telling you he doesn't like labels. If this is the case, he doesn't want you for his girlfriend or anything else remotely resembling a commitment.
You Just Know
It's that gut feeling telling you that you are way more into him, than he is into you. You want him, and you want the relationship to work so bad, but your gut is telling you that he is not for you, and the relationship is not meant to be.
There comes a time in most us our lives when want to slow down, and have stability in both our personal and professional lives. It is important not to waste your time and break your own heart waiting around for a guy who doesn't want the same things you want. Or maybe, I know this is harsh, but he just doesn't want to spend his life with you.
Don't be the girl that tricks, manipulates, or gives a guy an ultimatum to get him to commit to you. Marriages that start off with reluctance are not likely to have a happy ending. You are better than that and you deserve so much more. Be patient. You cannot force these things. If you force a relationship with a man who doesn't want to settle down, or at least not settle down with you, you are likely to have a lot of regret in your future.
What is your experience dealing with a guy who won't commit? What did you do? Did you go, or did you stay? Please share your experience?
"Because what’s worse than knowing you want something, besides knowing you can never have it?” - James Patterson, The Angel Experiment