Traditional Relationships VS Modern Relationships...Which Is Better?
In today’s world there is a struggle between the old and the new. There are those that are strongly committed to traditional ways of living, including relationships and marriage. There are also people who want to make their own rules and rail against the thought of what is traditional.
I recently read an article which said that traditional relationships tend to last longer. Cue my mental eye roll as I prepare to be told how men being the bread winners with the little woman staying home cooking and cleaning is the key to everlasting love. But that is not quite what the article said.
The article said that traditional relationships with clearly defined roles tend to last longer, and I can see how that makes sense. But I also think that a more modern relationship can also have roles within the relationship and be just as long lasting. Notice the word “lasting”, not the word happiness is being used, but we will get to that.
Traditional Relationship
There are many types of traditional relationships and home lives, but the basic traditional relationship involves a male and female with the man typically being the more dominant partner while the woman is more submissive.
In this context, submissive does not mean voiceless, but the woman will follow the man’s lead and play a more supporting role in the relationship.
The traditional relationship also has more clearly defined roles for the couple. For example the man could be the sole provider or primary breadwinner. The man would also take care of home repairs, trash, and vehicle maintenance.
For the woman, she would take care of the cooking, the cleaning, and be the primary caretaker of any children. Although this type of relationship may seem antiquated and would not work for some, it works for many, and the relationships do tend to last longer.
Modern Relationships
Modern relationships make their own rules. They break free of the stereotypical roles of relationships and marriage, and define their own coupledom. Just like the traditional relationships, there are many types of modern relationships.
A modern relationship may be an unmarried couple living together. Or a married couple who both work and share chores, taking turns as needed. A common modern couple is two working parents, who make decisions together, and share chores.
The roles are less clearly defined and each are expected to work together to get household chores done and the children taken care of equally.
In a modern relationship, the woman may be the breadwinner, and the man may play a more supporting role. While modern relationships offer equality to both partners, the undefined roles may result in frustrations and resentment as one half of the couple feels like the other is not pulling their weight.
Studies show that modern relationships do not usually last as long as traditional relationships, but why is that? I don’t think it’s about more morals, or good and bad people. But more perhaps that a person who sees themselves as a traditionalist is less likely to divorce than a more modern minded person is, no matter how miserable they are.
Quantity and quality are not remotely the same thing, and a longer marriage does not mean years of happiness. People stay in relationships for many reason, and love isn’t actually at the top of the list.
Also I would think a person with their own income, who is financially independent, is more likely to call it quits on an unhappy relationship than one who is financially dependent.
What are your thoughts on traditional relationships versus modern relationships? I really want to hear your thoughts and opinions on this topic. Please share!
“We accept the love we think we deserve.” ― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower
