How To Spot A Liar...Both In Person And Through Text
I really dislike the word liar, but let's be honest, don’t we all tell the occasional lie? No one wants to be labeled a liar, but most people do not tell the truth all the time. Sure, the motivation for lying may vary from dishonest compliments with the purpose of not hurting someone’s feelings, to self-serving statements to elevate an individual’s status. But a lie is a lie.
Studies have found that most people lie in everyday conversation. No one should be lying and no one wants to be lied to, but there is a big difference between the harmless “white lie”, and the lie meant to deceive, manipulate, or control. It comes down to intent. Ironically, many people lie about never lying.
Some of us are more observant than others at reading people and can tell when we are being lied to, or when someone is lying a little or a lot. Being a human lie detector is a very useful skill that requires attention to detail, a great memory, and the ability to read body language.
If you are not a bonafide human lie detector, here are some tips to help you figure out when someone is lying.
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Signs Someone Is Lying In Person
Avoids Eye Contact
Eyes Shift Frequently
Body Is Still, With Little Hand Movement
Voice May Get Higher In Pitch
Voice and Body Language Do Not Match
Seems Nervous
Clears Throat and Swallows A Lot
Talks Very Fast or Really Slow
Starts To Groom Self
Signs Someone Is Lying Through Text
Over-Explains
Too Much Detail and Unnecessary Info
Delayed Responses To Texts
Text Bubble Starts and Stops A Lot
Avoids Direct Responses To Certain Questions
Changes Subject Without Really Answering Questions
Texting “Voice” Seems Different
If you think someone is lying to you then they probably are. Especially if this is someone you know fairly well, and have had many encounters with them. Trust your gut. Liars have a tell, you just need to pay attention and you will hear them loud and clear.
We are all imperfect humans, who lie occasionally to avoid hurting someone’s feeling, admitting fault, and to save face. It happens. But there is a difference between lying to spare someone pain, and being a self-serving coward who is uses lies to avoid responsibility, avoid difficult conversations, and to use and abuse people.
“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you.” ― Friedrich Nietzsch