5 Biggest Marriage Complaints From Wives

I think at this point, most adults recognize that marriage is challenging at best, and hard work in reality. Love does not conquer all, especially when those in the marriage feel like they are being taken for granted and not getting the best effort from their partner.

As someone who has been married for over 20 years and has listened to many friends, relatives, and coworkers complain about their past and present spouses, it’s no wonder divorce rates are so high.

A happy and fulfilling marriage requires a team effort, and many women feel their spouse is just sitting on the bench and watching them take it for the team, constantly.

Here Are the Biggest Complaints Women Have About Their Marriage

Household Chores

Household chores and who does them can become one of the biggest sources of contention in a marriage. Whether the wife is a stay-at-home mom, or works full time, for many households, the wife does most, if not all the cooking, and cleaning, including picking up behind her spouse. She also does the shopping, bill paying, and pet care, and takes care of the couple’s social calendar.

If she stays at home, it is like her shift never ends, and if she works outside the home, she is doing twice the work of her partner. Can you say seething resentment?

Child Care

The common belief that women should be the primary caretaker of children in a family is still very prevalent, despite the fact that women are often financial contributors to the household and sometimes the breadwinners.

Some women ask “Is it that he can’t or he won’t take on more of the childcare efforts”. Obviously, dads cannot breastfeed but they can bottle feed. Both parents can comfort and discipline their children and help with homework, but many women complain that it all falls on them unless they ask their husbands for “help”. Yes, they have to ask for help from their spouse to take care of their own children. This is a source of frustration.

In-Laws

Whether the in-laws are too involved or not involved at all in the marriage and the family, they can be a source of contention for a couple, especially when there are grandchildren.

When a couple weds, the spouse has to come first, and a husband should stick up for and defend his wife against meddling relatives, and not expect her to tolerate hostile or toxic situations.

Monster-in-laws are not just a myth, they do exist.

Finances

Money has always been and continues to be a big issue in marriages. Who controls the money, who decides how the money is spent, and who pays for what is a big stressor for married couples.

Many households are dual income, but both spouses may not bring in equal pay. Whether all the money goes into one pot or the couples keep separate accounts, agreeing on financial goals and spending habits often creates disagreements.

According to a Department of Labor statistic, married women make 75.5% of what married men make. Unmarried, never-married women make 94.2% of what their unmarried male counterparts make.

Communication

It sucks to be married to a poor communicator. Communication is always the cornerstone of any good relationship, but it doesn’t work miracles. Communication has to be reciprocated and with good intentions. Listening is also part of good communication and so is being open to receiving information.

Many wives complain about having the same discussions, complaints, and arguments over and over again with their spouses. They don’t feel heard and often feel more like mothers and bosses than wives and partners. How do you express the same feelings and frustrations time and again without sounding like a nag or a shrew? Is the hubby just nodding his head but checking out of the conversation? Or is the wife expecting him to read her mind? I suppose both could be true.

In a relationship, if your partner does not consider your complaints and frustrations valid, you may be with the wrong person. Your partner should respect you enough to not want you working all day at a job and coming home and working like a dog taking care of the house, the kids, and him. A person who allows that to happen is selfish and has a lack of respect for you, and maybe a lack of love for you as well.

What are your thoughts on complaints wives have? What are your complaints? How did you address them? Did anything change? Please share your thoughts and experience!

“If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind. If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn’t follow through on little things, he will do same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he’s okay with disappointing you. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do. If he’s choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn’t respect your feelings and needs. “Busy” is another word for “asshole.” “Asshole” is another word for the guy you’re dating. You deserve a fcking phone call.” ― Greg Behrendt

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Is It A Break Or A Break Up?

Sometimes we need a break from a relationship, and other times we just need to break up. Some relationships are meant to be, and if you are meant to be together things will come together for the two of you. But if it is not meant to be you will not find your way back to each other mentally or emotionally.

No matter what the reason is for the break, your true intentions and their intentions should be clear. It needs to be understood if whether the break is to take some time apart to make things better, or if it is really just an extended break up because neither of you have the courage to call it quits.

If you are unsure if your relationship is just on a break or if you have really broken up, I have some guidelines for you.

How To Tell If It’s A Break Or A Break Up

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Spending Time Together

If you are on taking a break from your relationship but still spending time together then you are on a break. It means you care for one another, that you like each other, and still want to spend time together as friends as you figure things out.

Dating Other People

If the moment you two decided you needed a break, and one or both of you starts hitting up the dating sites or starts going to clubs and bars seeking someone new, then it is a break up.

Taking a break from the relationship is supposed to be a time to reflect and maybe reconnect, but if one or both of you is taking this opportunity to see what else is out there then it is time to make the break permanent.

Frequent Communication

If you continue to talk and text to each other everyday then you are just on a break. Frequent communication during a break means you miss each other, and respect each other enough to keep one another in the loop of what’s going on in your life, and to confide and seek advice.

Sleeping With Other People

If you are taking a break but not officially broken up, you should not be having sex with other people. Sleeping with other people can mean the end of any possible reconciliation.

If one of you sleeps with someone else it will likely be hurtful to your partner. If you are both sleeping with other people on your break, then you are not ready for a committed, monogamous relationship, at least not to each other.

Talking To Your Ex

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Now that you’re on a break, you or your partner decide to reconnect with your ex. If you are reconnecting with your ex for comfort, friendship, or sex, it is a break up and not just a break. There should be awareness that reconnecting with an ex would be considered extremely hurtful and like a betrayal.

Sometimes a break from a relationship is needed to give you both perspective. Maybe you had started to take each other for granted or were starting feel your love fading away.

A relationship break can be a good a thing or just a delay of the inevitable, but al least now you will have a better idea of whether or not you two will come back together.

What are your thoughts on breaks from a relationship versus a break up? Do they work or do they ultimately turn into a break or make the relationships stronger? Please share your thoughts and experience on this topic?

“When someone leaves, it’s because someone else is about to arrive.” - Paulo Coelho

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