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I love storytelling and always want my readers to have options. You can find my blogs on my YouTube channel and listen to them on the go.
Christmas Gift Ideas For Her
Oh the joys of Christmas, and gift buying. Well if you read my blog about "Christmas Gift Ideas For Him", then you already know a few things. First, you know nothing beats gift cards for the difficult to shop for. Second, always ask for Christmas lists. Third, have a gift theme for an added surprise.
Pampering will usually be a winner. When I suggest the gift of pampering, I mean a massage, manicure, pedicure, or a nice facial. A spa day would be a nice choice for the wife.
For the lady in your life who loves to cook I recommend Le Creuset cookware. Le Creuset is pricey but it is by far my favorite cookware. The skillets and pots are cast iron, sturdy, and of the highest quality.
Maybe your lady love loves to curl up with a good book. Get her a tablet for reading, a collector’s edition of her favorite book, or a journal to log all of the books she has read.
Last, but not least is scents. If your girl is anything like me she has a signature scent, that go-to perfume. Snoop around if you have to, but think about her smell. Is it citrusy or flowery? Does it remind you of fresh laundry, or the ocean? With that thought in mind head to Sephora, or Macy’s, and find the scent that you would love to smell on her.
So those are my ideas on gifts for her. Get to shopping boys. Time is running out. Christmas is almost here!
Christmas Gift Ideas For Him
It’s that time of year again, and Christmas shopping for family and friends can be stressful, and nerve racking to say the least. While this blog will be full of gift suggestions for your man, your dad, and even your brother, I always think the best way to go is to request a gift list from your loved ones. This is common practice in my family, for adults and kids alike. This ensures gift satisfaction since they are getting exactly what they asked for. The below recommendations are just to add an element of surprise, and wow factor to your special one’s day.
The key to great gift giving is knowing your loved one well, but let’s be honest, some people are just difficult to shop for. For the guy who doesn’t know what he wants, or does not “need” anything, go the gift card route. Get him a gift card to his favorite store, and call it a day.
If your fella has hobbies then I suggest a bundle of gifts with that theme. If he loves to golf, I recommend golf balls, tees, gloves, hat, and a nice trunk locker bag for him to organize his stuff. If he is a hiker or camper I suggest you hit up REI and go crazy, no seriously. For the hiking/camping bundle I suggest hat, sunblock, ready to eat meals, warm socks, sleeping bag, and tent night lights.
For the "manly man" go for grill stuff or liquor. ManCrates.com has some of cutest gift ideas around for men. A ManCrate is basically a gift basket of meats, nuts, grill stuff and many other themes, but the cool factor is that it comes in a small crate and crowbar to pry it open with. Now if your guy is a scotch drinker, a good gift bundle idea would be a nice bottle of scotch, a decanter for it, and two scotch glasses that are customized with his initials.
Lastly, let’s not forget the sports lover. I would recommend ball caps, tee shirts, and jerseys of his favorite team. If you could get your hands on some sports memorabilia, or playoff tickets that would make his year.
I am really big on Christmas, and giving in general. It makes me happy to try to find new and exciting ways to surprise my loved ones, and show them how much they mean to me. How do you do it with your family and friends? Do you wing it, asks for lists, or just do gift cards? Please share your advice and experience!
The Slow Burn Romantic Chemistry...Hot Or Hot Mess?
I am a total romantic, and nothing gets me better than the slow burn. The slow burn is the unexpected budding of romantic feelings between two people over a period of time. The slow burn relationship usually starts off very platonic, and then like a switch something changes.
The slow burn theme is very common in romance and suspense novels, and television series because the build up, and the "will they, won't they" question creates excitement for the readers and viewers.
Plus, there is the correlation to life, and how the slow burn seems to be the recipe for long term happiness and relationship longevity.
Here’s my list of television shows with stand out slow-burn romantic chemistry.
FEATURED VIDEO
Slow Burn Romance In Television
Mulder/Scully - The X-Files
Ross/Demelza - Poldark
Any Vampire Series
Jack/Kate/Sawyer - Lost
Lady Mary/Matthew - Downton Abbey
Phryne/Jack - Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries (Epic Slow Burn)
Archer/Lana Kane - Archer
Rick/Michonne - The Walking Dead
Jim/Pam - The Office
As much as the slow burn appeals to many people, the actually consummation seems to be a buzz kill. Many shows lose their steam after the slow burn couple gets together. Is it because the slow burn is fantasy and romantic, but with a relationship comes struggles.
Is it possible some of the relationship pitfalls and struggles can be avoided if the transition from crushes to lovers is handled carefully?
The slow burn is special because the foundation of the relationship is not based on appearance or sex, but genuine fondness and chemistry that grew into more. The scary thing, and the undeniable hotness about the slow burn, is the build up. The build up of wanting more, and wanting each other.
Over time, the desire for things to be out in the open is there, but there is also an element of fear. A fear that maybe you will not live up to each other’s fantasies. A fear that you will be disappointed, or even worse, that you will disappoint them. Highly unlikely with the slow burn chemistry, but still a very realistic fear.
I have had experience with a slow burn, and I would use three words to describe the feelings: complicated, intense, giddy. It catches you by surprise, and then it becomes all you can think about.
I truly believe that the slow burn flame never goes out. It may not always burn with the same intensity as it did when first ignited, but depending on those involved, I firmly believe the smolder is there to stay.
What are your thoughts on the slow burn? Any slow burn experience? If so, did you go for it or stay put? Please share your story or experience!
“Hard to sit here and be close to you, and not kiss you.” - F. Scott Fitzgerald
Massages...Do You Have A Gender Preference For Your Masseuse?
I love getting massages. They are relaxing and therapeutic. I get a massage as often as I can, which is still not frequent enough. While planning an upcoming spa trip, which includes a massage, the topic came up of gender preference for the masseuse.
Personally, I prefer a female masseuse and I will explain why. I have had massages with males in the past, and with a couple of them I became uncomfortable because their hands seemed to be trying to slowly head towards areas that most definitely did not need massaging. I know there are plenty of male and female masseuses that are professional and appropriate, but after those questionable experiences, why would I make myself uncomfortable when the goal is to relax?
I asked men and women in my life if they had a gender preference and the responses were mixed. Most of the males felt they might feel more comfortable with a female masseuse, but also felt they might choose a male if they wanted a massage with more intense pressure. Some of the ladies did not have a preference, but said they always seemed to be paired with females. One also said she had an experience similar to mine, with the uncomfortably massage with a male masseuse. Sorry guys but I'll pass on the opposite sex massage services.
During a massage, you are alone in a room with a stranger, and you are only wearing a towel, and maybe panties. It is very important to feel safe and comfortable with the experience. Of course, a funny thought always comes to mind when I see a woman come out of a massage with a male masseuse, and that is Sex and the City. I will not say what happens, but check out the very talented, and beloved masseuse in episode "Attack of the Five Foot Ten Woman". All I can say is what the what! HI-larious!
In all seriousness, with recent news events, I highly recommend you choose very carefully where, and with whom you get a massage.
Favorite Color...What Does Your Favorite Color Say About You?
What is your favorite color? Everyone has a favorite color. We love certain colors because of how they make us feel, thoughts they bring, and even how they make us look.
Most of us never really think about why we like a certain color, and if asked to explain the preference one might actually struggle for an answer.
I know when my daughter asked me why I loved my favorite color I found it almost indescribable, because it was a feeling.
I am drawn to my favorite color instinctively, picking paint colors, clothing, and decorations without even realizing the similarities.
I find the psychology behind our favorite colors so fascinating I thought to dedicate a blog to the topic. I want to break it down by colors and what those colors say about those who love them.
I am going to use the primary colors, as well as a few others I believe to be very popular.
Here’s What Your Favorite Color Says About You
Red
Much like the color red, you are vibrant. You have a zest for life, and live it to the fullest. Red lovers are also very passionate and determined.
Blue
Those who favor blue are reliable, confident, and strong. Much like the ocean, blue lovers can be calm, cool, and stormy, but they value stability above all.
Orange
Much like the red lover, the orange lover is bold, friendly, and outgoing. They are also cravers of attention.
Yellow
The yellow lovers are knowledge seekers and generally happy people. They are intelligent and love to learn new things.
Green
Inspired by nature, the green lovers are consistent, loyal, affectionate, and generous. This color lover places high regard on self-worth and reputation.
Black
The black lover is artistic, moody, strong-willed, and determined. They can also be demanding, and somewhat closed off to others.
So there you have a very simple breakdown of our color preferences and a description of how that color preference may reflect who we are as individuals. It seems a bit odd and makes sense to me all at the same time. I find that the color analysis is spot on for me.
You will often find me wearing black. Black is simple, classic, slimming, and goes with everything. It is a close second to my favorite color. In case you are wondering my favorite color is blue. I like many shades of blue, but I prefer a rich, dark blue with a slight hint of gray.
What is your favorite color? Does the color analysis correctly describe your personality? Please share your thoughts!
“Blue has no dimensions, it is beyond dimensions, whereas the other colours are not … All colours arouse specific associative ideas, psychologically material or tangible, while blue suggests at most the sea and sky, and they, after all, are in actual, visible nature what is most abstract.” – Yves Klein
In Case You Missed It...Catching Up On Great Network Shows Via Netflix
I admit that I may have a small Netflix addiction. However, in my defense as a busy working mom, I do not get to indulge as much as I would like to. Over the years, I have tried to find some time for the important people in my life, while keeping up with my favorite hobbies of writing and reading.
During that time there has been, and continues to be, many televisions shows that look interesting to me. Unfortunately it is hard to find the time to watch everything I fancy. And the DVR will only hold so much.
Here's What You Are Missing
Being Mary Jane
Being Mary Jane follows the life of an Atlanta based TV news anchor, and trial and tribulations of her personal and professional life. I will share that Mary Jane has a very exciting and challenging love life, that's for sure. I am hoping that Mary Jane gets a happy ending.
Girlfriends' Guide To Divorce
GGTD follows the life of Abbey McCarthy, a very successful self-help author, whose seemingly perfect life is anything but. She is going through a nasty divorce, trying to raise her two kids, and keep her crap together. The show is very funny and relatable.
Bates Motel
Out of the three above mentioned shows, Bates Motel was the most satisfying to watch. I won't spoil it for you, but it had an ending suitable for Norman Bates. So pick one, pour a glass of wine, or a nice mug of coffee, curl up with a a soft throw blanket, and get to binging.
What am I missing right now? Please share your recommendation with me!
Nice vs Good...How Do Others See You? How Do You See Yourself?
The terms nice and good are often used as if they are interchangeable, but they are not. Nice is defined as someone who is pleasant, agreeable, and amiable. Nice people don't like to ruffle feathers or deal with conflict.
Those who are "nice" may often take the easy way out. Basically nice is a facade. Nice is what others want you to see. To be fair, nice people are usually nice to be around, just don't expect them to make good decisions.
Good is defined as morally excellent, virtuous, honorable, and worthy. Good people can be nice but their decisions are based on their morals and values, not what they think will please others or to avoid conflict. Good people do the right thing, even when it's the hard thing.
Like many people, I want to be accepted and liked, so I try to be nice. But in a choice between nice and good, it is always more important to me to be a good person and do what is right. Sometimes that means saying no or telling someone something they do not want to hear.
It takes courage and conviction to truly be a good person. I struggle daily because being nice is easier. Giving in and telling people what they want to hear is easier.
Nice vs good can be applied to many situations in our lives. I take pride in being a good mom, not a nice mom. I am nice to my children, but more importantly my girls are told no sometimes because there has to be limitations, and it is my job to set an example.
A nice mom may not set limitations because she doesn't want to deal with a tantrum or may fear her child being angry or upset with her. As a woman, ask me what kind of man I want and I will tell you I want a good man all day long.
So I ask you, where do you fall on the nice vs good spectrum? I always strive to be a good, honest person. Maybe too honest sometimes to truly be considered a nice person. Nice people give me pause, as there is an element of falseness within them.
Early on I question what's behind the mask a nice one wears, but if you give them enough time the mask will slip and much will be revealed.
The Look Back...Why You Can't Just Walk Away
The look back, is the turn back of one or both people after they have said their goodbyes. They don't want their time together to end, but feelings have not been verbalized.
I like to people watch because I find human behavior so interesting. We do so many subtle things that mean so much. One particular behavior has caught my eye recently, and that is the look back. Some of you may be wondering what the heck is the “look back”, but others knew right away.
Once I noticed it, I mean really noticed it, I had to know more. I started to notice it in the morning drop offs with parents and their children at my daughter's school. I saw it with groups of friends parting ways after a movie. But the big stand out was with couples, and the slow budding romances.
I suppose this blog goes hand in hand with my recent “ Love…Being, Falling, Crazy In It” blog. The look back in the case of love and lust is often about regret. It is the silent “one last look at you before I leave you, because believe me, I don’t want to leave you".
The look can be subtle or smoldering, but either way it is still telling. The return look is just as telling, and important. If only one of the two looks back, it does not bode well for a future dalliance.
Just about every romantic movie I have seen has the look back moment. I had to think back over the years for the look back moments in my history. In the past I fought the temptation sometimes. I wanted to look back, to see him again yes, but also to know if he was looking back at me.
When your eyes meet that one final time on the look back, it sends your heart fluttering, and you feel warm and tingly all over. It puts a smile on your face, and thoughts in your mind that will leave you restless.
FEATURED VIDEO
Here Are Some Movies That Have Memorable Look Back Moments
Sixteen Candles
Sense and Sensibility
Bridget Jones's Diary
Waiting to Exhale
The Princess Bride
10 Things I Hate About You
Dirty Dancing
Never Been Kissed
The Titanic
Love Actually
The Notebook
The Wedding Singer
Does a look back at someone after you, or they have started to walk away mean nothing, or everything? I suppose one could say it depends, and that may be true. In the case of love and lust, only the two looking back at each other know why they couldn't resist that one last glance. What do you think?
Thanksgiving Traditions...How Do You Celebrate?
I love Thanksgiving, and I am truly thankful for all of my good fortunes. When I think of Thanksgiving, I think of food, family, friends, and football. I know that for many, holiday time can be stressful or depressing, but for me I feel like this is when I really shine.
It really is not about how big, or small your crowd is, but about appreciating how wonderful things are, and hopes of better things to come. My crowd size varies from year year, from as small as six people, to as large as twenty. Personally for me, ten people is the most comfortable size for me to cook for.
This year I am doing something a little different. I am hosting a pre-dinner the Wednesday before at one home to spend time with those who will not be with us on Thanksgiving.
Then on the actual day of, I will host another Thanksgiving with some different guests at a different house. The menus will be different, as will the locations and ambience, which makes it more interesting for me.
I used to get very stressed out cooking for the holidays, wanting everything to be perfect. But those years are long gone. I am pretty confident in my abilities, but can also shrug it off if something doesn’t turn outright. I also don’t try to go it alone.
My two daughters are awesome sous chefs, which helps a lot. I love teaching my girls to cook, and seeing that growth from year to year.
So while my holiday menus are mostly decided, I am now teetering between a roasted or fried turkey. For a while there, I was really on a fried turkey kick, and then I was over it.
In the last three years, I roasted the turkeys, brined for 48 hours before cooking, and they were delicious. But it may be time for a change-up again. Either way, I plan on a stress-free Thanksgiving.
Here Are My Tips For A Stress Thanksgiving...
Plan Ahead - Once you know how many people you will be hosting, start planning seating, your menu, and beverages.
Make Ahead - Many dishes, especially desserts and appetizers can be made ahead of time.
Enlist Help - Have you kids, partner, or friends assist as needed with food prep, serving, and clean up.
Bring A Dish - When entertaining large groups, have guests bring side dishes, desserts, or beverages.
Perfection Not Required - Remember the gathering is about being together and giving thanks.
Size Doesn't Matter - Whether your celebration consists of 2 or 20 people, you have something to be thankful for.
What are your holiday plans? Hosting a dinner? Attending someone else's dinner as a guest? Or going out for a nice steak dinner at a restaurant? Please share your plans and tips for having a wonderful, stress free Thanksgiving!
When you practice gratefulness, there is a sense of respect towards others. - Dalai Lama
Vivid Dreams...Why Do We Have Them?
I have always dreamed a lot. I suppose many people do. But lately my dreams are more vivid, more frequent, and very memorable.
I am notoriously a terrible sleeper, so I usually take melatonin, which helps. But with a night full of dreams that run the gambit of happy, sad, scary, and just plan old weird, I am constantly waking up exhausted.
You may be asking, “what exactly is a vivid dream?” Well a vivid dream is a dream that feels almost life like. Vivid dreams feels so real they can be hard to distinguish from reality at times.
Some vivid dreams can seem so real that you wake and can still smell a scent or feel a touch.
So why all the dreaming lately? I think it’s a combination of a new supplement I am taking, and stress. The supplement affect my hormones, which affects sleep, because it affects serotonin.
Also I know taking melatonin could be the culprit, but I have been taking melatonin for a long time to help with my insomnia, so that is not a change.
I think perhaps stress is the biggest contributing factor to my vivid, and somewhat crazy dreams. I go through my days, and through life facing many stressors, like most adults.
We get through our days suppressing the urge not to freak out, or cry, or yell, or generally not overreact to tough or challenging situations. But those suppressed feelings stay there, under the surface.
Common Reasons For Vivid Dreams...
Taking Melatonin (Aha)
Eating Spicy Food Before Bed
Watching Weird TV Before Bed
Stopping or Starting New Medication
Stress and Anxiety
I actually find vivid dreams amazing, but unfortunately having them can leave your body not as rested as it should be after a full night’s sleep. Most vivid dreaming happen during rapid eye movement (REM), which occurs in 90 minute cycles while you sleep.
If I had the choice, I would take vivid dreams over dealing with my stress by road raging, or yelling at my kids, or stuffing my face and eating my feelings. But of course I am not getting enough sleep, so I need to find some balance.
What are your thought on dreaming and vivid dreams? How do you dream? Do you dream vivid? Do you remember your dreams? Please share your thoughts and experience!