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6 Signs He Wants To Be More Than Friends
Some friendships are destined to take a romantic turn. A relationship rooted in friendship has a solid foundation, and the strong possibility of great compatibility, and many years of happiness. A beautiful friendship can become a beautiful romantic love.
Hopefully both individuals in this friendships are on the same page about whether or not the relationship will remain platonic.
We are often terrible at hiding our feelings from those who barely know us, and it is even harder to hide our feelings from those closest to us. Despite the fact that secret love, and crushes, are often obvious to the bystander, those involved are frequently clueless.
The signs that he wants more than friendship are there if you know what to look for.
6 Signs He Likes You More Than A Friend
FEATURED VIDEO - 6 Signs He Wants To Be More Than Friends
The Way He Looks At You
Do his eyes get all googly when he looks at you? Does he try to hold your gaze for a little too long, or stare at you intensely? If he is your “friend” but gazing into your eyes, he most certainly wants to be more than friends. Unfortunately for him, our eyes often betray us.
We cannot help but want to stare at the object of our affection. His eyes tell you how he feels, and deep, longing looks usually mean feelings of deep longing.
The Way He Communicates With You
Does he frequently find little ways to text you, call you, or just chat you up. You two have your own language, and he often teases you, or calls you by pet names. It is not just about the frequency of the communication, but also the way he talks to you.
He will likely be softer and gentler in his approach, or extra funny and charming. He will also be easy to talk to, which is a big one with women.
How He Treats You In Contrast To Others
Pay close attention to how he treats you in contrast to how he treats others. Do you find that you get to see the softer, funnier, more charming version of him than what others get to experience. While some people might describe him as cold, unapproachable, or quiet, with you he seems to be the complete opposite.
With you he tends to be warm, upbeat, and easy to talk to. So he is basically adorable and hard to resist.
The Amount Of Attention He Gives You
You are never far from his mind, so his focus is usually on you. In a group setting he will seek you out. If you are at a gathering he somehow always ends up by your side. He is always your biggest supporter, and advocate, and will not entertain a negative word against you.
If he cannot be by your side, he will keep you in his line of sight.
His Reaction To Your Presence
If your friend secretly wants more, his body will react immediately to your presence. When you walk into the room he will likely straighten his posture, he may unconsciously start to groom himself, and his eyes will beam, even though he doesn’t realize it.
He wants to look good for you. He may also get a little fidgety and nervous because he wants to make a good impression.
He Gets Jealous
He cannot help himself. The thought of you with another guy drives him crazy. Maybe you’re taken, or perhaps he’s taken, but no matter your current situations it doesn’t change the fact that he wants you to be his.
It doesn’t change the fact that he wants you all to himself, which is why seeing you talk to other guys, or hearing about your dates or relationships not only infuriates him, but also breaks his heart a little.
If a guy does more than a couple of these things in relation to a woman who is not his chick, he has got it bad. If you are interested in your friend as well, flat out confess, or find a way to let him know how you feel. However, if you are not interested, and he is permanently friend zoned, add some distance between you two so as to not lead him on.
What signs do you look for when think someone wants to be more than friends? Do you agree with my list? Please share your thoughts and experience!
“This isn't a crush, it's obsession. You are never not in my thoughts. Your scent carries across a room and paralyzes me with longing. I don't want to hold your hand. Part of me wants to set you on fire and hold you while the flame consumes us both, to eat your heart so I know that only I possess it entirely.” - Gwen Hayes, Falling Under
You can also find the video version of this blog on YouTube. Please don’t forget to like the video, and to subscribe to my channel.
First Date Conversation Starters
First dates can either be super fun and cute, or crazy awkward and uncomfortable. There’s usually not a whole lot of in between. I equate a first date to a job interview. You are nervous, but trying to project confidence, and make a good first impression.
There are literally thousands of questions you could ask your date, but remember your goal, and remember that you are also being interviewed for a possible date number two as well.
The goal is to get to know enough about them on the first date to make a determination of basic compatibility, which is the decider for a second date.
I chose the below questions for the first date because I think they are safe, non controversial questions that give you enough intel about your date, but shouldn’t creep them out. You do not want to make them feel like they are being interrogated, or like they being interviewed to be a sperm donor.
The first date questions should be light and fun, but also informative.
First Date Conversation Starters
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1. Where are you from originally?
Many adults move for education and for work, so there is a good chance your date is not a local native. Depending on the part of the country someone is from, or if they were born and raised outside the US, it really shapes the person they are.
2. Where did you go to school?
Asking about his school will give him an opportunity to humble brag, and for you to learn about his educational background and career. Alma Mater pride talk is always fun.
3. What are you favorite things to do?
The purpose of this question is to find commonality. If he enjoys spending his weekends antiquing and visiting art galleries, while you spend your weekends surfing and camping, you are probably not a good fit.
But you also find out that you both love doing the same things, which makes planning a second date a no-brainer.
4. Do you have pets?
Is he a cat lover or dog lover, or hates animals altogether? Sounds like no a big deal, but it would be if the relationship progressed.
It’s great to find out early that your potential mate is allergic to cats, and you have two cats at home.
5. What’s your favorite form of entertainment? Books? Music? Movies?
I do not necessarily consider any answers to these questions deal breakers, and you do not need to have everything in common with a mate, but it is nice when you share similar taste in music and movies.
6. What is your guilty pleasure?
This is just a fun question, and a test to see how much they are willing to open up, and possibly a peek into their silly side. We all have a guilty pleasure, but will they admit to theirs?
There’s nothing wrong with being a terrible singer and loving karaoke.
7. What really annoys you?
Some people find large crowds annoying, while others would rather not interact with children or animals.
It might be helpful to know that their pet peeve is people who are indecisive, especially if you know that is one of your main quirks.
8. Who is your favorite entertainer?
The answer to this question should be very telling, and it should spark lively conversation. Is he open to fun banter and disagreement about who is the best singer, actor, writer, or musician, or does his opinion have to rule?
Be sure to keep the conversation natural, and space your questions out over the course of your time together. Hopefully you will find these questions helpful on your next first date, but remember that while you are asking these questions you are also trying to determine if you and your date have good chemistry.
What is your experience with first dates? Do you agree with my list of conversation staters? What questions would you ask on a first date? Please share your experience!
“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, falling in love with you was beyond my control.” - Gwen
6 Signs He's Interested In A Serious Relationship...With You
We all come to a point in our lives when we want to slow down, find the right person, and have a life with them. This doesn’t necessarily mean marriage for everyone, in fact many people are blissfully happy in coupledom, with no formal commitment.
However, at some point a decision is made to be in a committed relationship with one person, with the hopes of spending your life together.
Dating is fun, but most of us do not want to date forever. At some point you want to feel that the relationship is heading somewhere, but how do we know. Of course you can always ask him how he feels.
You can have that awkward “where is the relationship going conversation”, when likely you should already know by how he behaves in the relationship.
Signs He’s Interested In A Serious Relationship
He Makes You A Priority
He makes time for you and wants to spend time with you. He ensures that you know where you stand in his life and leaves no doubt that you are a priority to him. When he is running late, or has to work late he let’s you know.
You’ve Met His Friends and Family
Men are not going to bring a woman around their friends and family unless they see the relationship going somewhere. If he wants you to meet his family and friends, then he is telling you he is serious about you, and wants his friends and family to know it as well.
He Wants To Meet Your Family
Meeting the family of someone you are dating for the first time is nerve racking and a little uncomfortable. So if your guy is not only willing, but wanting to meet your family, it is a big sign that he wants a serious relationship with you.
He Makes Nice With Your Friends
A man who sees you as part of his future will want to have a good relationship with your friends. He realizes that they are important to you, and because they are important to you, he wants to have a good relationship with them.
He Wants To Be Exclusive
If a man is serious about you, he will not want to see or date other people. Also, the thought of you dating other guys would be unbearable for him. If he wants to see you and only you, and asks that you are exclusive, then he is saying he wants a serious relationship with you.
He Tells You
A man just coming out and telling you how he feels is obviously the best way to know how he feels, but sometimes getting men to discuss their feeling can be like pulling teeth. But if he is really serious about you, and sees a future with you, he will tell you.
When it comes to matters of the heart, our judgement can become clouded when trying to make a determination between what is and what we want. Life would be much simpler if we all “used our words”, and communicated our wants and feelings clearly. As this is not always the case, we have to read the signs, when we lack the courage for words.
What signs do you look for when you think a relationship is turning serious? Do you agree with the signs I say to look for? Please share your experience!
"When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." — When Harry Met Sally
Photo by mentatdgt from Pexels
5 Signs He's Not Interested...So Keep It Moving
If the man you are crushing on is a friend or if he is a nice guy, he will not want to hurt your feelings by coming out, and directly stating that he is not interested in you romantically. So he may intentionally or unintentionally drop hints in order to spare your feelings.
To spare yourself some heartache and embarrassment you need to know what signs to look for.
Let's be honest, you are probably sending signals, and he may not even be picking up on them. A man can be pretty clueless sometimes when a woman is romantically interested in him. However, if a man is romantically interested as well, there are many signs to look for.
The first sign, and most obvious, is the look in his eyes. Try as we might, we cannot hide love in our eyes.
Signs He Is Not Interested
He Will Talk About Other Women
If a man is romantically interested in you, the last thing he wants is for you to think about him being with another woman. He will avoid discussing other women who could be considered a romantic threat with much care.
But if he is not interested and does not see you romantically, he may openly discuss the women he finds attractive, talk of girlfriends, and mention the women he is dating.
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Often Reminds You That You Are Friends
Friendship is the foundation of any strong romantic relationship. However, when you are his "buddy", and he is always reminding you that you are his friend, you have been friend zoned.
Yes, it is possible that he wants you to know how much you mean to him, and how much he values your friendship, but if it is also accompanied by him being gross in front of you and treating you like one of the guys, you're out. He is not interested.
He Avoids Being Alone With You
If a guy is interested, he will want to be able to have his alone time with you. He just wants to talk, and stare, and spend as much one on one time with you as possible. However, if a guy is not romantically interested it will not occur to him to spend alone time with you, or he many even actively avoid it.
The Way He "Doesn't" Look At You
When a man is interested in you romantically there is a lot of eye contact. Ask yourself does he look deep into your eyes when you talk to each other? Does his face light up when you walk into a room? Chances are if you have not seen these behaviors from your love interest, then he is not interested.
Your Gut Feeling
Forget what you want to believe, and listen to your gut feelings. While those deep down feelings, those nagging thoughts in the back of your mind, are not always right, most of the time they are accurate.
You will likely have a feeling deep down that your affection is not returned. It is important not to cloud your thoughts with your desire for a different outcome.
You will not win his heart by doing his laundry, buying him things, or even by being his friend with benefits. He is either feeling you or he is not. You deserve someone who wants to be your guy. You deserve someone who feels the same way you that you do about them.
By now you should be able to recognize whether or not your feelings are returned by your romantic interest. Unrequited love is heartbreaking, but we cannot force someone to feel something they do not, no matter how much we want them to. For the sake of your own heart, and well being, you will need to find a way to move on and get over your love.
Take comfort in knowing that you will fall in love again, and that love will be returned. What is your experience with a romantic interest who seems less than interested? Do you wait and hope, try harder to win them over, or move on? Please share your experience!
“A person doesn't know true hurt and suffering until they've felt the pain of falling in love with someone whose affections lie elsewhere.” ― Rose Gordon, Her Imperfect Groom
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The Friend Zone...Can Men and Women Be Just Friends?
Can a man and a woman be just friends without one or both wanting more? The question is debatable depending on who you ask, but the short, honest answer is it depends. I have always had a lot of male friends, and they have never left the friend zone, and I never wanted them to.
I truly love and value my guy pals, both gay and straight. The friendships are somewhat different from my female friendships. The dynamic is different and fulfilling in unique ways, without the drama and challenges of a romantic relationship. They work for me.
I suppose the real questions is, "Is it possible that some of my male friends were just playing the waiting game?" Were they waiting for the right time to make their move, or hoping that I would see them differently? Which of course was never going to happen, because I see my close guy friends like brothers.
Yes, I can find them attractive, but in a non sexual way. They might as well be eunuchs.
The Friend Zone vs Free Parking
Now, be sure not to confuse the friend zone with the free parking zone. I refer to the guy you are really cool with, but there is also potential for more, as being in free parking zone.
You are his friend and content to keep it that way for now, but you are also careful not to do, or say anything to sabotage a possible relationship in the future. So you don't burp in front of him, or pig out, and definitely do not discuss any gross bodily functions with him.
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There is also sexual tension in free parking, and occasional flirting and looks that are more friendly than not. Maybe the timing is not right, and nothing will ever happen. Or just maybe fate will bring you two together. There is possibility in free parking.
In taking a very unscientific poll, I discovered more women than men thought the opposite sex friendships were possible. Most of the women I know have close male friends, and said they do not have a problem with their man having female friends, but there were some restrictions.
Men on the other hand were less definitive in their response. A couple guys didn't mind at all. While others were not okay with the wife or girlfriend having male friends at all. Is it because they worry that he is thinking what they think when they are with their female "friends"? Hmm.
Have I been so naive this whole time? I refuse to believe so. Yes, I understand that men think about sex way more than women do. And I know that some of my closest male friends over the years have had deep feelings for me. Some confessed at the time, and others told me years later.
Unfortunately, as wonderful as they were, I just could not see them in that way. In theory, if a male and female are good friends then they are very compatible. They have a lot in common and truly enjoy each other's company.
Friendship is the foundation for any long lasting relationship, but you also need romantic and sexual chemistry.
So what are your thoughts? Can men and women be just friends? Are you currently friendzoning someone? Have you been friendzoned and want out? Or just maybe you are in free parking, waiting for the right time to make your move. Please share!
"A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other...Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever” - Dave Matthews Band
7 Signs He’s Definitely Interested In You...
We have all been there. It can be both exciting, and torturous all at the same time trying to figure out if a guy is interested in you romantically. You try to decipher if he likes you just as a friend, or if there is a possibility of more. His lack of confession may be confusing, and seem like he is playing games.
Take comfort that it is not always about playing games or being a player. Just like women, men want to protect their egos and their hearts too.
He wants to know how you feel before he puts himself out there. But as much as he may try to hide it, there are some definite signs that he has feelings for you, and is interested.
7 Signs He's Interested In You
The Way He Looks At You
A guy who is interested will lock eyes with you a lot. I call it the love gaze. He cannot help himself. And it's not just about the eye contact itself, but the look in his eyes. His desire for you, and his happiness to be in your presence is difficult for him to hide.
Check for dilated pupils. When someone is looking at someone they are interested in their pupils dilate.
The eyes truly are windows to the soul. An interested man's eyes will beam at you. Pay attention to the way he looks at you versus how he looks at everyone else. The difference will be obvious, even if he tries to mask it.
The Way He Remembers
When a man is interested he pays attention. He will remember your favorite food, your favorite color, and of course your birthday. He will even remember your allergies, and pet peeves if you have mentioned them. He wants to know everything about you. The more he knows about you, the better chance he will have of winning you over.
We tend to remember what we care about. Sure, he may just have a great memory, but we all data dump useless information. Your guys knows your likes and dislikes because you are important to him.
He Let’s You Vent
Guys generally dislike drama and long conversations, especially via text and over the phone. But if a guy is willing to let you vent to him, he may be a keeper. Not only does he let you vent, but he tries to come up with solutions for your problems, and to cheer you up. A fella doing all of this is probably already in love.
FEATURED VIDEO - 7 Signs He’s Definitely Interested In You
The foundation of any good relationship is a strong friendship. A guy who is willing to listen to your frustrations, is a guy who is demonstrating that he can be there for you as a friend, and maybe more as well.
His Body Language
A guy's body language can tell you almost everything you want to know, without him having to say a word. He may show that he is nervous by being fidgety in your presence. Your guy's nervousness is because he cares about what you think of him. He may also be smiling really big, which is telling you that he is happy to see you.
Take a look at where he looks when something funny happens and you are in a group setting. Does he look to you first? If yes, he feels closest to you than any other person in the room.
Also notice where is feet are point in group setting. Is he facing your direction? His feet point towards where he wants to look. He want to keep you in his line of sight.
The Time and Effort He Gives You
We are all busy, and our time is valuable. So a guy who is willing to make time for you is showing you how important you are to him. Whether it is giving you a ride to the airport, or helping you with a school or work project, he is showing you that you mean something to him.
We make time for what is important to us. If he is interested, he will make the time and effort to see you. And if he is unable to see you, he will find a way to communicate with you to let you know you are on his mind.
He Asks About Your Day
This goes hand in hand with letting you vent. When a man asks you about your day, he is telling you he cares. He wants to know what is going on in your life, because he wants to be part of it.
Asking about your day is a big deal. He knows it can lead to a long conversation, and possible venting, and he's okay with that because you are a priority to him.
Your Gut Feeling
Even though we sometimes play coy or oblivious, we are usually aware deep down when someone is romantically interested. If he seems interested, then he probably is interested. You can either give him time to make his move, or you can take the lead.
Yes, guys can be confusing at times, and almost seem wishy washy. But just remember, just as you are trying to figure out how he feels about you, he is doing the same with you. Someone has to be willing to put themselves out there if anything is to ever happen.
Now you know the signs to look for in your crush. Is he interested? What are your thoughts? What other signs do you look for?
"The extreme form of passionate love is secret love." - Japanese Proverb
You can also find the video version of this blog on YouTube. Please don’t forget to like the video, and to subscribe to my channel.
Simple Ways To Read His Body Language
People communicate more non-verbally than verbally, so being able to read someone’s body language is a valuable skill. There are many tips and tricks to use, but it always comes down to our ability to observe those around us, and pay attention to the little things.
I believe if we are honest with ourselves we can admit that we spend quite a bit of time hiding our true thoughts and feelings. We hide our annoyance when we are in the check out line behind someone paying with a check, or how much we dislike our boss, or even how much we like the new guy or girl at work.
When it comes to hiding your feelings I bet you think you have it all figured out, right? You play it cool and try to keep your face emotionless when your jerk boss tasks you with something they should be doing. Or the girl you are crushing on is sitting across from you in a meeting.
How do you hide your feelings? Unfortunately, you can’t hide your feelings if your boss or crush knows how to read body language.
I have an expressive face so my irritation, anger, and annoyance are rarely disguised. I think I am much better at hiding my other thoughts and feelings. I hide my fear and anxiety really well. I have also been really good at hiding my attraction for certain men in the past. At least I think so.
Experts would say I had telltale signs that gave me away, of course if they knew what to look for. The eyes say it all. They will dilate to take in more of the one they are attracted to.
There is no all encompassing list of signs your body will exhibit with any one particular emotion, but the below lists have been shown to accurately predict ones true intent or feelings.
Body Language Signs
Here are signs you might exhibit if you dislike someone:
Not facing them when they talk to you
False smiles
Very little eye contact
Keeping a large distance
Yawning
Side stepping while talking to them (you want to leave)
Touching your nose
Here are signs you might be angry or hostile:
Balled fists
Pupil contraction
Running fingers through hair
Compressed or whitened lips
Crossing arms
Rapid speech
Intense glare
Shaking
Redness in face
Here are some signs you might exhibit if in the presence of someone you are crushing on or secretly in love with:
Lots of eye contact
Mirroring behavior
Gesture on appearance such as fixing tie, socks, or hair
Great posture, straightens up when in their presence
Is fidgety, and plays with things such as buttons or a pen
Touches face a lot out of nervousness
Plays with round objects in presence (this one is about sexual attraction and breasts)
Dilated eyes because they like what they are looking at
Feet point towards them, in order to keep them in your line of sight
Feeling vulnerable yet? I am. We all wear masks sometimes, often in the workplace. But our bodies betray us because research shows that whatever we are feeling shows up on our body first, not our conscious mind.
Once our mind becomes aware we can put on that fake smile or look of interest. Don't worry, sometimes people need to know how you really feel.
What are your thoughts on body language? Are you able to read someone’s body language? Please share your thoughts and experience!
Body Language...Can You Tell What He Is Thinking?
Positive body language between couple
Ok, so technically I am no body language expert, but I find it interesting and have done lots of reading on the topic. I feel pretty confident in my abilities to regurgitate, I mean share, the the info I found.
I believe if we are honest with ourselves we can admit that we spend quite a bit of time hiding our true thoughts and feelings. We hide our annoyance when we are in the check out line behind someone paying with a check, or how much we dislike our boss, or even how much we like the new guy or girl at work.
I bet you think you have it all figured out, right? You play it cool and try keep your face emotionless when your jerk boss tasks you with something they should be doing. Or the girl you are crushing on is sitting across from you in a meeting.
How do you hide your feelings? You can't, not if your boss or crush know how to read body language.
I have an expressive face so my irritation, anger, and annoyance are rarely disguised. I think I am much better at hiding my other thoughts and feelings. I hide my fear and anxiety really well. I have also been really good at hiding my attraction for certain men in the past. At least I think so.
Experts would say I had telltale signs that gave me away, of course if they knew what to look for. The eyes say it all. They will dilate to take in more of the one they are attracted to.
There is no all encompassing list of signs your body will exhibit with any one particular emotion, but the below lists have been shown to accurately predict ones true intent or feelings.
Here are signs you might exhibit if you dislike someone:
Not facing them when they talk to you
False smiles
Very little eye contact
Keeping a large distance
Yawning
Side stepping while talking to them (you want to leave)
Touching your nose
Here are signs you might be angry or hostile:
Balled fists
Pupil contraction
Running fingers through hair
Compressed or whitened lips
Crossing arms
Rapid speech
Intense glare
Shaking
Redness in face
Here are some signs you might exhibit if in the presence of someone you are crushing on or secretly in love with:
Lots of eye contact
Mirroring behavior
Gesture on appearance such as fixing tie, socks, or hair
Great posture, straightens up when in their presence
Is fidgety, and plays with things such as buttons or a pen
Touches face a lot out of nervousness
Plays with round objects in presence (this one is about sexual attraction and breasts)
Dilated eyes because they like what they are looking at
Feet point towards them, in order to keep them in your line of sight
Feeling vulnerable yet? I am. We all wear masks sometimes, often in the workplace. But our bodies betray us because research shows that whatever we are feeling shows up on our body first, not our conscious mind. Once our mind becomes aware we can put on that fake smile or look of interest.
Don't worry, sometimes people need to know how you really feel.
Signs Of Flirting...A Learned Skill Or Natural Instinct?
There is a certain art to flirting. It can be fun and exhilarating, if you get it right. Or a hot mess, and make for a great bloopers reel if you get it wrong. Flirting means to act amorous without serious intent, but it can also be about sending out feelers.
If he flirts back maybe he's interested. Or if he's too dense to pick up on your signals, he's not the guy for you.
I know some people who are notorious flirts. They flirt with everyone, young or old, male or female. It's a game to them, and they play it well.
I learned how to flirt pretty young, around 12 years old. Of course very innocently, with passing notes, teasing, and smiles. I got better. I think my flirting abilities are a combination of natural instinct, and learned skills over time.
I suppose one could ask why do we flirt. Do we flirt for attention? To see if we still "got it". Do we flirt to manipulate, to perhaps get out of a ticket? I think this is often the case. We flirt to get what we want.
We also flirt to get who we want. Sometimes we don't even realize we are doing it. A coy smile here and there. A little inside joke. The teasing and playfulness. It's all flirting, albeit innocent intentions. Or not so innocent.
Flirting is safe. It is a way to test the waters, without truly putting yourself out there. If you flirt and they flirt back, there may be something there.
So where do you do most of your flirting? At the bar or club? I bet most flirting happens at work or school. The places we spend most of our time. Maybe you know how to flirt, and you know how to recognize when someone is flirting with you. But just in case you don't know, here are some body language clues that someone is flirting.
Signs Of Flirting
Signs He's Flirting...
Smile
Remembers what you say
Touches you
Nervous twitch while talking to you
Blushing or sweaty hands
Leans in to be closer
Signs She's Flirting
Smile
Touches lips or hair
Touches you
Lots of laughing (you are not that funny)
Compliments and/or insults you
Leans in to be closer
Men and women are similar creatures. Some have perfected the art of flirting, while others are still trying to figure it out. If you are not a great flirt, don't worry about it. It is actually cute and refreshing to see the unskilled flirter. Ultimately, fate will have its way. If it is meant to be, it will happen.
We try to hide our feelings, but forgot our eyes speak. - Unknown