Life and love have lots of ups and downs and tend to leave many people wanting a do-over. If the Hallmark channel has taught me anything, it is that returning home and high school reunions are for rekindling old love and romance.

If you could go back and do it all over again, would you? Some old flames needed to be put out, but others burned so hotly that years later the embers still smoldered. There are pros and cons to rekindling an old love. As time has passed, you may be remembering more of the good and forgetting a lot of the bad.

If you are considering reigniting an old flame, here are the pros and cons to consider.

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Pros Of Reigniting An Old Flame

It’s Familiar

No matter how much time passes, you never forget your first love. Coming back together years later may feel like coming home. The relationship feels familiar and comfortable, and comforting in many ways. You came back together and it was like you were never apart.

It’s Feels Good

Somehow the rekindling of an old flame takes you back in time and makes you feel all giddy and silly again. The excitement and passion are crazy. You have been transported back to being that gushy twenty-something girl who doodled his name over and over again.

You’re Both Different

Whether it has been ten years or twenty-five years, you have both grown and changed. The relationship ended for a reason in the past, but people can change, and perhaps the obstacles faced before are no longer an issue.

Cons Of Reigniting An Old Flame

Both The Same

While some things change, other things also stay the same. Yes, you are both older and hopefully wiser, but you are basically still the same people. Perhaps once you get past the newness of your old relationship, old issues and problems will resurface.

Your Lives Don’t Mesh

You may have reconnected at a reunion or on Facebook, but you live thousands of miles apart and your lives don’t fit together. You both have responsibilities and neither are capable nor willing to just pick up and leave your current life to chase a possibility.

Unrealistic Expectations

While you were once the hot “it” couple, neither of you was perfect, but you may be remembering things differently. You may be disappointed to find that you no longer share the same interests, that they are not as attractive as they used to be, and you may not actually be compatible anymore.

At the end of the day, I think many of us would love a do-over with a lost love. Whether you choose to give it a go should depend on why it ended the first time and if the current man or woman before you seems worthy of a second chance. If they have a history of abuse of any kind I say absolutely do not let them back in your life but otherwise, I recommend going for it. If your heart is open and you are available, what do you really have to lose?

What are your thoughts on rekindling an old flame? Romantic or ripe for disaster? Please share your thoughts and experience!

Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take. - Pietro Aretino