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5 Signs He Trusts You
Trust is important to all of us. Whether it is family and friends, or a business partner or a lover, being able to trust the people in our lives matters. There are variations and different levels of trust. We trust different people in our lives, with different matters in our lives.
Men and women are different creatures. Women tend to allow themselves to be more emotionally vulnerable and open with their feelings.
While men tend to be more guarded, and sometimes closed off when it comes to conveying their feelings, emotions, fears, and failures.
If you want to know if a man in your life trusts you, there are some simple signs to look for. Chances are, if he is doing several of the five signs I have listed below, he really trusts you.
5 Signs He Trusts You
He Asks For Your Advice
If a man is asking you for your advice it means that he not only trusts you, but that he also respects you, and values your opinion. He respects your knowledge, your intellect, and perhaps realizes that you know him well enough to protect him from himself in some circumstances.
He Takes Your Advice
It is one thing to ask for advice, and a whole another thing to actually receive it, and put it to use. I can respect a man who knows what he wants, and what he wants to do generally, but no one has all the answers.
Sometimes we need to seek the advice of others, and if you are one of his go to people for advice, then that says a lot. Him taking your advice is a big deal. It means that he really trusts you.
He Is Vulnerable With You
When a man feels comfortable venting his frustrations, concerns, or fears to a woman in his life it means he considers you a safe place, and that he trusts you.
Men are not big on looking weak to women, but because he trusts you, he knows that you are not judging him. He knows that you want to be there for him and support him, which is why he is able to be vulnerable, and seek solace in your words or your arms.
He Doesn’t Get Jealous
Yes, he may get a little jealous if you are flirty with every guy in the room, and ignoring him, because that is seriously not cool. But he won’t get jealous just because a guy speaks to you, or you go out with your friends, because he knows your heart, and he knows that he can trust you.
He Confides In You
If a man opens up about his past, or his childhood, and shares his secrets with you, it means he trusts you. It is never easy to discuss personal details, especially sad and hurtful details from one’s past or childhood with anyone, so consider yourself lucky to be allowed into this place by the guy in your life.
We all need someone in our life who we respect and value their opinion. We all need our “person” so to speak. Whether a relationship is romantic or platonic, if a man trusts you enough to let you in and be vulnerable with you, you are important to him.
Do you agree with the signs that a man trusts you? What would you add or take off the list? Please share your thoughts and experience!
“Whether it’s friendship or relationship, all bonds are built on trust. Without it, you have nothing. “ - Unknown
The Importance Of Passion In Relationships
Passion is defined as intense, driving, or overmastering of feeling or conviction. Passion is ardent love. Passion is most certainly present in courtships. Passion is shown in that crazy desire to see each other, and to be together all of the time in the early stages of relationships.
Passion is shown in hot kisses, and intense sex, but passion is not love. Love is the most important element for a good relationship, but without passion can it truly be a happy union? I do not believe so, but we all set our own standards for what makes a good, healthy relationship.
The Importance of Passion
The argument could be made that passion fades over time in a relationship, and that the fading is not necessarily a bad thing. Over the course of a relationship, as you really get to know one another, you communicate more effectively, and understand each other better.
Better communication will reduce disagreements, however, not every discussion is the same or equal.
Hopefully you and your partner can have passionate discussions about books, movies, and even politics. Two people with their own thoughts, and opinions, disagreeing respectfully, but keeping the everyday fun and interesting, makes life more exciting.
Otherwise what do you have? I suppose just two people going through life together, waiting for death.
Signs Of Passion In Relationship
You Long For and Miss Each Other When Apart
Great Sex
You Inspire Each Other
You Want To Spend Time Together
Opinionated Conversations and Occasional Intense Discussions
Signs Of No Passion In Relationship
No Sex
Boring, Mechanical Sex
No Disagreements
Nothing To Talk About
Not Excited About Each Other
What To Do
What you do about the lack of passion in your relationship depends on how you got to this place, and how you feel about the need for passion in your relationship.
Did you marry someone who was always kind of boring, and with no fire, and thought they would somehow change? Or was the relationship once hot and intense, and has slowly fizzled out?
There are things you can do if you want to bring back the passion to your relationship. There is a lot of advice out there, and some will work and some will not.
It all depends on the people involved, how committed they are to fixing the lack of passion, and the starting levels of passion in the beginning of the relationship
My advice is to keep is simple. Put down the devices. Go on a date night. Discuss everything, including your sexual fantasies. If the thought of discussing sexual fantasies with your partner makes you uncomfortable, then that may also be why there is a passion problem.
There are great self- help books on market, and last but not least there is couples counseling.
What are your thoughts on the importance of passion in a relationship? Passion in a relationship is not just about sex, it is about an overall feeling and desire towards your partner, and each other. Do you think one can have a happy, fulfilling relationship without passion? Please share your story or experience!
“Does your relationship match your sensuality? If it doesn't, you've settled.” - Lebo Grand
4 Reasons To Trust First Impressions
The saying, “you only get one chance to make a first impression” is literally true. So, then it goes without saying that you had better make that first impression count. First impressions carry a lot of weight with people and they how they view you, and may create a huge relationship obstacle to overcome in the future.
Some people make great first impressions, and others not so much. First impressions are not always accurate, but I say when in doubt trust your instincts.
I have met some people, and had an instant connection and chemistry with them. The relationships with positive first impressions tended to remain positive throughout the years.
I have also ended up having amazing relationships with people with whom the first impressions were not great, and things started off rocky. Through life experience I have learned that initial personality conflicts can lead to negative first impressions.
Over time, personality conflicts, and misunderstandings, can be overcome, and from that, great friendships and relationships can bloom.
First impressions provide valuable information. Here are four reasons to take the information you gather from first impressions and trust it.
Reasons To Trust First Impressions
They Are Unaware They Are Being Observed
One of the best ways to learn about someone is to observe them. Even better if they are unaware that they are being observed. When people are unaware that they are being observed their masks slip off.
I am not talking about spying on people, or invading their privacy. The observations should take place in public settings, where the individual is comfortable and with friends, co-workers, or lovers, but unguarded. Observe at a distance, and you will learn a lot.
They Did Not Know Who You Were
Think Undercover Boss. When people want to impress you, because of who you are, or what they think you can do for them, they may behave differently, especially if you are in a position of power. But if they don’t know who you are, you will see the real them.
If they are a kind person, they will be kind no matter who you are. However, if they think you are a “nobody”, and they are not a good person, they will treat you accordingly.
They Did Not Know Who You Were Going To Be
Most people start off as equals, but do not necessarily remain that way in life. Perhaps you are classmates, or co-workers, but then one of you becomes hugely successful. Coming up together gave you opportunities to observe them in a very unique way.
You know if they are a bully, or a nice person. Very valuable point of view you had.
Your Gut Feelings
When you meet people for the first time there is a vibe about them. If your gut feeling tells you this person is bad, not trustworthy, or that they are dangerous, you should listen to that inner voice. Your gut is on to something.
Keep your guard up, watch the individual closely, and with more information and time, you will figure things out. When in doubt, always trust your gut.
It is important to not confuse personal biases, and stereotypes of certain people, with actual observations of behaviors, words, and gut instincts. Just because extremely good looking people are stereotyped as being dumb doesn’t mean that’s actually true.
More importantly, just because someone seems nice doesn’t mean they are truly a good, trustworthy person.
What are your thoughts on first impression? Do you trust first impressions? Any regrets on listening, or not listening to, your first impression? Please share your story or experience!
“If you have carefully examined hundred people you met in your life journey, it means that you have read hundred different books! Every person you know is a book; world is full of walking books; some are boring, some are marvelous, some are weak, some are powerful, but they are all useful because they all carry different experiences of different paths!” - Mehmet Murat ildan
Physical Attraction VS Mental Connection...Are They Equally Important?
It is not usual for someone to see a person, and instantly have a mental connection with them. Most people are visual, so physical attraction is often what piques our romantic, or sexual interest in another person.
Physical attraction often comes first, but there are times when a mental connection can happen almost instantly, or so I have been told.
Mental connections can occasionally be confused with strong physical attractions. You can desire a person so much that you create a mental and emotional connection in your mind that really doesn’t exist.
Once the sexual act occurs, or the attraction wears off, the mental connection “suddenly” leaves.
Physical attractions are honestly an everyday occurrence. There are attractive people everywhere, but good luck finding a deep mental connection with someone. They are rare, and they are special.
Physical Attraction
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Physical attraction is based on physical appearance, and how attractive you find another person. Physical attraction is about a pretty or handsome face, or a nice figure or sexy body. You desire them. You want them. You like the sound of their voice, the way they move their body, and even the way they smell.
Signs Of Physical Attraction
Big Smiles
Nervousness
Grooming
Touching
Lots Of Eye Contact
Mental Connection
Mental connection is not mutually exclusive from physical attraction, but it is so much more. A mental connection is about shared interests, similar intellect, and chemistry. You get one another, and just click.
Mentally you feel close to them, and you have a quiet, unspoken understanding about many things. You can communicate with your eyes, because with your mental connection, you often know what the other person is thinking or feeling.
Signs Of A Mental Connection
Conversation Is Effortless
You’re Comfortable Being Yourself With Each Other
You Can Read Each Other
There Is An Intensity To The Relationship
You Feel In Sync With One Another
You Share A Powerful Mutual Respect
Which Is Better?
Physical attraction is important, and the importance of being physically attracted to your partner should not be discounted. However, the challenge with physical attraction is the inevitable change of physical appearance over time.
We all age, and gravity will wreak some havoc on the body. If a relationship was primarily based on physical attraction, then the partners will surely become dissatisfied in the long run.
Mental connections usually take time to flesh out. A mental connection is not noticed from across the room, and usually happens only after interactions, and getting to know someone. It should be noted that a mental connection may also be realized after just one conversation.
In my opinion, mental connections win every time. Physical attraction is important, but looks fade. Also I have found that how I felt about someone as a person directly affected how I viewed their attractiveness.
I have met men in the past, and at the initial meeting I found them to be attractive. After getting to know them, I became turned off by their personalities, or lack of intelligence, and no longer found them attractive.
With mental connections, people can become more attractive. The deeper the connection, the greater the attraction. Mental connections often create love goggles, which prevents one from seeing physical flaws that they would normally zone in on, because they are so in love.
For me, it comes down to who would I want to spend the rest of my days with. Do I want someone who I find very attractive, but have little or no mental connection. Or do I want to be with someone I have an amazing mental connection with? I think the answer is obvious, but I believe it also depends on where you are at in your life.
What are your thoughts on mental connection versus physical attraction. Which do you value more? Please share your story or experience!
“Physical attractions are common, but a mental connection is rare. Once you’ve had the latter, the former will never be enough” - Unknown
All The Ways You Are Sabotaging Your Relationships
You say you want a relationship, but the minute you are in one you tend to do things to end it. It is a pattern repeated all too often by you. You are a self-saboteur, and relationship destroyer. If you find yourself entering relationships with high hopes, only for it to crash and burn unexpectedly, time and time again, it may be time for some self-analysis.
There are many reasons people will sabotage a relationship, but fear is usually the number one culprit. Fear of being of alone, and fear of rejection. Sounds weird, right? You fear being alone, so you do things in relationships that make you end up alone.
It’s about protecting your heart, and self-preservation. Unfortunately, you may lose out on a great relationship, maybe even the love of your life, due to your sabotaging.
Perhaps after reading this blog, you won’t stop sabotaging your relationships, but at least you will be aware of the signs when you are doing it.
The Ways You Are Sabotaging Your Relationship
Unrealistic Expectations
Did you really think that you would continue having sex twice a day, every day, for your entire relationship? Sex is a very important part of a relationship, but it is unrealistic to think that your sex life would not change over the course of your relationship, for many different reasons.
If you find yourself unhappy with the frequency of sex in your relationship you need to make your feelings known, in a thoughtful, non-accusatory manner.
Did you think your partner would not age, or that their body wouldn’t change over the years, especially after having kids? Completely unrealistic, shallow, and possibly indicative that you are not truly in love if you hyper-focus on your partner’s aging, or gaining a few pounds over the years.
Comparing Your Relationship To Others
If there is one thing that I have learned over the years, it is that things and people are not often what they seems to be. People tend to have a public and private persona, and that goes for couples as well. Some couples can seem so loving and perfect in public, and may be a hot mess behind closed doors.
It is often after couples split that truths come out, and only then do we realize we were trying to live up to an illusion.
Focus on your relationship. Live your best happy. No one’s relationship is perfect. Your relationship may be amazing, or it may completely suck. Either way, your thoughts and feelings about your relationship should be based on how your relationship makes you feel about yourself, and how it makes you feel about your partner.
Not Communicating Your Feelings
While we sometimes assume or wish our partners were mind readers, they are not. If something in your relationship is bothering you, or upsetting you, you need to speak up, and let your partner know. They cannot fix a problem they are unaware of.
Yes, there are times when it should be obvious, at least to you, that something they do or say is not okay with you. But remember, they are not you.
If your partner is constantly doing and saying things that annoy or anger you, tell them. If it continues, it may be time to move on.
Keeping Secrets
Whether you sneak the occasional cigarette or hide purchases from your partner, eventually you will be caught, and the issue of trust will come up. Do you need share every single thought or desire that comes to mind, I would say not necessarily, but keeping secrets in a relationship can be dangerous.
The gauge I recommend using regarding whether or not you are keeping a secret is to think about how your partner would feel about the information you are not sharing. If you are withholding information from your partner because you think they would be hurt, angry, or feel betrayed, then you are keeping secrets.
Being Selfish
It’s all about you, all the time. It has to be your way, and if it is not, temper tantrums, and bouts of sulking will commence. Does that sound familiar? We all want to have things our own way. We all have our own wants, desires, and preferences, but in a relationship sometimes you don’t get your preference.
Relationships require compromise, and sometimes that compromise may mean doing what your partner wants. If you choose your partner wisely, their wants and desires will closely align with yours. If you chose an opposite, or someone pretty different, be prepared for a lot of compromise, or to be completely selfish.
Relationships are challenging, and require work to maintain a healthy one. Not every relationship will work out, or is meant to be, but is important give yourself an opportunity to truly be happy. If the right person comes into your life, don’t sabotage things because you are afraid. Life is short and there are no guarantees, but taking a risk for a chance of happiness will be worth it every time.
What are your thoughts on sabotaging relationships? Do you agree with my list? Are you a self-saboteur? Please share your story or experience!
“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
The Science Of Soulmates...Explained By Spooky Quantum Entanglement
Did I pique your interest just a little bit with the title? I mean after all, aren’t the terms soulmate and spooky quantum entanglement interesting topics to say the least? I am a romantic, and a bit of a nerd, so this combination of topics are most certainly up my alley.
I have a particular fascination with time, and whether or not it truly moves linearly, or if it even exists at all. This blog is all about time, and soulmates, and spooky quantum entanglement.
This is where romance and love, meets science and the possibilities of the impossible.
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The Defined
Many of the terms and their definitions used in this blog are complex, arguable, and not easily defined, but in my simplest terms, and Wikipedia’s, here you go.
Time
Time is the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole. The truth of the matter is that time is a human concept, which is purely subjective.
We use clocks and devices as a means of tracking time, but how slow or fast, and in which direction time moves is individual. We all experience time differently.
The true meaning of soulmate is to have known and loved one another in many lives. Death does not separate true love, and soulmates will always find their way back to one another. The modern definition of soulmate is more simplistic.
Soulmates are two people who are drawn to each other, and connect on every level. There is an intensity and passion between soulmates that is difficult, if not impossible, to replicate. Very science-y right?
Spooky Quantum Entanglement
Spooky quantum entanglement is a physical phenomenon which occurs when pairs or groups of particles are generated, interact, or share spatial proximity in ways such that the quantum state of each particle cannot be described independently of the state of the other(s), even when the particles are separated by a large distance—instead, a quantum state must be described for the system as a whole. - Wikipedia
Mind blown, right? Spooky quantum entanglement is not for the faint of heart, or the easily confused.
The Intertwined
Everything is made of particles, and that includes human beings. With the knowledge that humans beings are made of particles, and applying the theory of spooky quantum entanglement, can we not see the possibility of the connection of two people, via their particles.
Whether they are sitting right next to one another, or in different cities, they are connected and their bodies can react to one another’s. They are soulmates in every way possible.
Soulmates may not physically be together, whether the separation is due to geographical distance, other relationships, or different timelines keeping them apart, the pull still exists.
Think back on all of those times you would feel happy, or sad, or your heart would just start racing for some unexplained reason. Those were the times you were feeling most connected to your soulmate.
You were feeling each other’s emotions. You were reacting to and mimicking the joys, and the emotional and physical pains of your soulmate.
The Belief
What do you call that feeling when you meet someone for the first time, but you feel like you have known them before? Something about them is familiar. Or what about when you keep running into the same person over and over again, as if something, the universe perhaps, is pulling you two together?
We have created all of these terms to explain away the mysterious. We call events coincidence and refer to some experiences as deja vu, but are they really? It’s more comfortable to dismiss and explain away, then it is to question and challenge the accepted.
Some might say that I am oversimplifying one of the universe’s most complex mysteries. Maybe I am, but that does not make it any less of a possibility.
If you believe like I do that nothing is ever truly gone, just changed in form, then you must believe that distance, time, and not even death can separate two people who are connected by the very fiber of their beings.
This blog is a combination of research, fiction writing, and my own personal theories. I am neither a scientist nor a mathematician, but the facts remain that there is more of the unexplained in our universe than there is of the explainable. Do you think I am wrong? Prove it…
“Our universe grants every soul a twin—a reflection of themselves—the kindred spirit – And no matter where they are or how far away they are from each other—even if they are in different dimensions, they will always find one another. This is destiny; this is love.” – Julie Dillon
5 Signs You're In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship
Unfortunately, sometimes people find themselves in emotionally abusive relationships, without even realizing it. Unlike physical abuse, the scars from emotional abuse are invisible, but just as damaging.
Emotional abuse can destroy the person that you once were, and leave behind an empty shell.
Sadly, many people stay in emotionally abusive relationships because they make excuses for the behavior of their partners, often blaming themselves. All signs of emotional abuse are not cut and dry. Relationships have ups and down, and people have fights and disagreements, but it is how you fight and disagree that can be abusive.
Signs Of Emotional Abuse
Talked To Disrespectfully
In an emotionally abusive relationship there is a lack of respect. You may be told to shut up, yelled at, or completely dismissed as you try to communicate your feelings or concerns. Sometimes the verbal abuse happens in front of others, but many times while you are alone. Emotional abusers are good at hiding their abusive side.
Blamed For Everything
Your partner is mean and disrespectful to you, but guess what, it’s your own fault. If you were not so overly sensitive, or whiny, or demanding, then they wouldn’t lose their temper and have to be mean to you.
They make you feel like everything is your fault, including their poor choices and mistakes. You often fear their anger here.
Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a form of abuse, as it diminishes your self-esteem, your self-confidence, and your self-worth. The gaslighter convinces you that it's all in your head and you are just being paranoid or remembering incorrectly.
Your partner makes you feel completely faulty. As if you have the worst memory ever, and are going completely crazy. It’s not them, it’s you.
Made To Feel Stupid
An emotionally abusive partner loves to belittle and make you feel less than. Your partner will humiliate and embarrass you in front of others with blatant disrespect, or making you the butt of a joke. They are even worse in private.
If you dare to challenge or question their judgement, they are quick to remind you how mentally superior they are to you. They do not value you or your opinion.
Controlling
An emotionally abusive partner tends to also be controlling. They want to know where you are at, where you are going, and who are you with. They want to tell you how to dress, how to act, and what to do. You are punished with silence or withdrawals of affection if you do not do things their way.
An emotionally abusive relationship can leave you feeling depressed, alone, and questioning your self worth. It is important to remember that you are not worthless, you do not need to stay in an abusive situation, and that you will be loved again, the right way.
What are your thoughts on emotional abuse? There are many signs to look for, which would you add? Please share your experience!
“Sometimes we refuse to see how bad something is until it completely destroys us.” - Unknown
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6 Signs You Have Outgrown Your Relationship
As the years go by, we grow and we change. Our wants and desires from 10 years ago may be vastly different than what they are today. It is inevitable. Life happens, priorities change, and as we gain insight and knowledge, our world view changes as well.
Unfortunately, sometimes our growth can negatively impact relationships in our lives, especially romantic relationships. The guy or girl that you were at 25 is not the same person at 35. You basically outgrow people in your life, including romantic partners.
If you are reading this, chances are you have already realized that you have outgrown your partner, but are looking for some definitive signs. Here are the six signs that you have outgrown your relationship.
6 Signs You Have Outgrown Your Relationship
Your Priorities Are Different
She is an ambitious, career focused money saver, while he prefers to focus on his hobbies, spend money like there is a never ending pot of money, and bounces from job to job. While once on the same page, one person has grown and become focused, while the other partner has become stagnant.
Your Interests Are Different
He is a political junkie and a huge Star Wars fan, while she is into reality television and fashion. He wants to talk about the upcoming election, and she is not even a registered voter. There is a problem here.
At some point these two people became polar opposites, and started to lack commonality. One is interested in world events, while the other is interested in looking cute and taking selfies.
Nothing To Talk About
You know that you have outgrown each other when you really have nothing to talk about, or it is the same old stories over and over.
It important to recognize that you have nothing to talk about because you have nothing in common, and you have nothing in common because you have outgrown each other.
You’re Bored
If you find your partner boring, you have outgrown them. The truth is that you find them boring because you now share different interests, are on a different intellectual levels, and no commonality any longer.
Different Values
Once upon a time you were both drinkers and into going out a lot. Now she’s a homebody, but he still likes to drink and go out a lot. She also likes to attend church, but he is a non believer.
Lifestyle and differing religious beliefs are big changes that happen as we grow and mature.
Different Goals
His goal is to have a nice family life with a few kids, while her goal is retire by 50 and then travel world. She doesn’t see kids in her future, and views them as a burden, while he sees children as a blessing.
It is hard to admit to yourself that you have outgrown your relationship without sounding like you are criticizing your partner or being judgey, but it is what it is. You should not feel guilty because you have grown and changed, especially if your growth has been for the better.
What are your thoughts on outgrowing relationships? Do you agree with the signs? When you outgrow a relationship do you stick it out or move on? Please share your experience!
“Sometimes the door closes on a relationship, not because we failed but because something bigger than us says this no longer fits our life. So, lock the door, shed a tear, turn around and look for the new door that’s opened. It’s a sign that you’re no longer that person you were, it’s time to change into who you are. It’s going to be okay.” - Lee Goff
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6 Signs He Wants To Be More Than Friends
Some friendships are destined to take a romantic turn. A relationship rooted in friendship has a solid foundation, and the strong possibility of great compatibility, and many years of happiness. A beautiful friendship can become a beautiful romantic love.
Hopefully both individuals in this friendships are on the same page about whether or not the relationship will remain platonic.
We are often terrible at hiding our feelings from those who barely know us, and it is even harder to hide our feelings from those closest to us. Despite the fact that secret love, and crushes, are often obvious to the bystander, those involved are frequently clueless.
The signs that he wants more than friendship are there if you know what to look for.
6 Signs He Likes You More Than A Friend
FEATURED VIDEO - 6 Signs He Wants To Be More Than Friends
The Way He Looks At You
Do his eyes get all googly when he looks at you? Does he try to hold your gaze for a little too long, or stare at you intensely? If he is your “friend” but gazing into your eyes, he most certainly wants to be more than friends. Unfortunately for him, our eyes often betray us.
We cannot help but want to stare at the object of our affection. His eyes tell you how he feels, and deep, longing looks usually mean feelings of deep longing.
The Way He Communicates With You
Does he frequently find little ways to text you, call you, or just chat you up. You two have your own language, and he often teases you, or calls you by pet names. It is not just about the frequency of the communication, but also the way he talks to you.
He will likely be softer and gentler in his approach, or extra funny and charming. He will also be easy to talk to, which is a big one with women.
How He Treats You In Contrast To Others
Pay close attention to how he treats you in contrast to how he treats others. Do you find that you get to see the softer, funnier, more charming version of him than what others get to experience. While some people might describe him as cold, unapproachable, or quiet, with you he seems to be the complete opposite.
With you he tends to be warm, upbeat, and easy to talk to. So he is basically adorable and hard to resist.
The Amount Of Attention He Gives You
You are never far from his mind, so his focus is usually on you. In a group setting he will seek you out. If you are at a gathering he somehow always ends up by your side. He is always your biggest supporter, and advocate, and will not entertain a negative word against you.
If he cannot be by your side, he will keep you in his line of sight.
His Reaction To Your Presence
If your friend secretly wants more, his body will react immediately to your presence. When you walk into the room he will likely straighten his posture, he may unconsciously start to groom himself, and his eyes will beam, even though he doesn’t realize it.
He wants to look good for you. He may also get a little fidgety and nervous because he wants to make a good impression.
He Gets Jealous
He cannot help himself. The thought of you with another guy drives him crazy. Maybe you’re taken, or perhaps he’s taken, but no matter your current situations it doesn’t change the fact that he wants you to be his.
It doesn’t change the fact that he wants you all to himself, which is why seeing you talk to other guys, or hearing about your dates or relationships not only infuriates him, but also breaks his heart a little.
If a guy does more than a couple of these things in relation to a woman who is not his chick, he has got it bad. If you are interested in your friend as well, flat out confess, or find a way to let him know how you feel. However, if you are not interested, and he is permanently friend zoned, add some distance between you two so as to not lead him on.
What signs do you look for when think someone wants to be more than friends? Do you agree with my list? Please share your thoughts and experience!
“This isn't a crush, it's obsession. You are never not in my thoughts. Your scent carries across a room and paralyzes me with longing. I don't want to hold your hand. Part of me wants to set you on fire and hold you while the flame consumes us both, to eat your heart so I know that only I possess it entirely.” - Gwen Hayes, Falling Under
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First Date Conversation Starters
First dates can either be super fun and cute, or crazy awkward and uncomfortable. There’s usually not a whole lot of in between. I equate a first date to a job interview. You are nervous, but trying to project confidence, and make a good first impression.
There are literally thousands of questions you could ask your date, but remember your goal, and remember that you are also being interviewed for a possible date number two as well.
The goal is to get to know enough about them on the first date to make a determination of basic compatibility, which is the decider for a second date.
I chose the below questions for the first date because I think they are safe, non controversial questions that give you enough intel about your date, but shouldn’t creep them out. You do not want to make them feel like they are being interrogated, or like they being interviewed to be a sperm donor.
The first date questions should be light and fun, but also informative.
First Date Conversation Starters
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1. Where are you from originally?
Many adults move for education and for work, so there is a good chance your date is not a local native. Depending on the part of the country someone is from, or if they were born and raised outside the US, it really shapes the person they are.
2. Where did you go to school?
Asking about his school will give him an opportunity to humble brag, and for you to learn about his educational background and career. Alma Mater pride talk is always fun.
3. What are you favorite things to do?
The purpose of this question is to find commonality. If he enjoys spending his weekends antiquing and visiting art galleries, while you spend your weekends surfing and camping, you are probably not a good fit.
But you also find out that you both love doing the same things, which makes planning a second date a no-brainer.
4. Do you have pets?
Is he a cat lover or dog lover, or hates animals altogether? Sounds like no a big deal, but it would be if the relationship progressed.
It’s great to find out early that your potential mate is allergic to cats, and you have two cats at home.
5. What’s your favorite form of entertainment? Books? Music? Movies?
I do not necessarily consider any answers to these questions deal breakers, and you do not need to have everything in common with a mate, but it is nice when you share similar taste in music and movies.
6. What is your guilty pleasure?
This is just a fun question, and a test to see how much they are willing to open up, and possibly a peek into their silly side. We all have a guilty pleasure, but will they admit to theirs?
There’s nothing wrong with being a terrible singer and loving karaoke.
7. What really annoys you?
Some people find large crowds annoying, while others would rather not interact with children or animals.
It might be helpful to know that their pet peeve is people who are indecisive, especially if you know that is one of your main quirks.
8. Who is your favorite entertainer?
The answer to this question should be very telling, and it should spark lively conversation. Is he open to fun banter and disagreement about who is the best singer, actor, writer, or musician, or does his opinion have to rule?
Be sure to keep the conversation natural, and space your questions out over the course of your time together. Hopefully you will find these questions helpful on your next first date, but remember that while you are asking these questions you are also trying to determine if you and your date have good chemistry.
What is your experience with first dates? Do you agree with my list of conversation staters? What questions would you ask on a first date? Please share your experience!
“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, falling in love with you was beyond my control.” - Gwen