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5 Signs He Trusts You
Trust is important to all of us. Whether it is family and friends, or a business partner or a lover, being able to trust the people in our lives matters. There are variations and different levels of trust. We trust different people in our lives, with different matters in our lives.
Men and women are different creatures. Women tend to allow themselves to be more emotionally vulnerable and open with their feelings.
While men tend to be more guarded, and sometimes closed off when it comes to conveying their feelings, emotions, fears, and failures.
If you want to know if a man in your life trusts you, there are some simple signs to look for. Chances are, if he is doing several of the five signs I have listed below, he really trusts you.
5 Signs He Trusts You
He Asks For Your Advice
If a man is asking you for your advice it means that he not only trusts you, but that he also respects you, and values your opinion. He respects your knowledge, your intellect, and perhaps realizes that you know him well enough to protect him from himself in some circumstances.
He Takes Your Advice
It is one thing to ask for advice, and a whole another thing to actually receive it, and put it to use. I can respect a man who knows what he wants, and what he wants to do generally, but no one has all the answers.
Sometimes we need to seek the advice of others, and if you are one of his go to people for advice, then that says a lot. Him taking your advice is a big deal. It means that he really trusts you.
He Is Vulnerable With You
When a man feels comfortable venting his frustrations, concerns, or fears to a woman in his life it means he considers you a safe place, and that he trusts you.
Men are not big on looking weak to women, but because he trusts you, he knows that you are not judging him. He knows that you want to be there for him and support him, which is why he is able to be vulnerable, and seek solace in your words or your arms.
He Doesn’t Get Jealous
Yes, he may get a little jealous if you are flirty with every guy in the room, and ignoring him, because that is seriously not cool. But he won’t get jealous just because a guy speaks to you, or you go out with your friends, because he knows your heart, and he knows that he can trust you.
He Confides In You
If a man opens up about his past, or his childhood, and shares his secrets with you, it means he trusts you. It is never easy to discuss personal details, especially sad and hurtful details from one’s past or childhood with anyone, so consider yourself lucky to be allowed into this place by the guy in your life.
We all need someone in our life who we respect and value their opinion. We all need our “person” so to speak. Whether a relationship is romantic or platonic, if a man trusts you enough to let you in and be vulnerable with you, you are important to him.
Do you agree with the signs that a man trusts you? What would you add or take off the list? Please share your thoughts and experience!
“Whether it’s friendship or relationship, all bonds are built on trust. Without it, you have nothing. “ - Unknown
The Importance Of Passion In Relationships
Passion is defined as intense, driving, or overmastering of feeling or conviction. Passion is ardent love. Passion is most certainly present in courtships. Passion is shown in that crazy desire to see each other, and to be together all of the time in the early stages of relationships.
Passion is shown in hot kisses, and intense sex, but passion is not love. Love is the most important element for a good relationship, but without passion can it truly be a happy union? I do not believe so, but we all set our own standards for what makes a good, healthy relationship.
The Importance of Passion
The argument could be made that passion fades over time in a relationship, and that the fading is not necessarily a bad thing. Over the course of a relationship, as you really get to know one another, you communicate more effectively, and understand each other better.
Better communication will reduce disagreements, however, not every discussion is the same or equal.
Hopefully you and your partner can have passionate discussions about books, movies, and even politics. Two people with their own thoughts, and opinions, disagreeing respectfully, but keeping the everyday fun and interesting, makes life more exciting.
Otherwise what do you have? I suppose just two people going through life together, waiting for death.
Signs Of Passion In Relationship
You Long For and Miss Each Other When Apart
Great Sex
You Inspire Each Other
You Want To Spend Time Together
Opinionated Conversations and Occasional Intense Discussions
Signs Of No Passion In Relationship
No Sex
Boring, Mechanical Sex
No Disagreements
Nothing To Talk About
Not Excited About Each Other
What To Do
What you do about the lack of passion in your relationship depends on how you got to this place, and how you feel about the need for passion in your relationship.
Did you marry someone who was always kind of boring, and with no fire, and thought they would somehow change? Or was the relationship once hot and intense, and has slowly fizzled out?
There are things you can do if you want to bring back the passion to your relationship. There is a lot of advice out there, and some will work and some will not.
It all depends on the people involved, how committed they are to fixing the lack of passion, and the starting levels of passion in the beginning of the relationship
My advice is to keep is simple. Put down the devices. Go on a date night. Discuss everything, including your sexual fantasies. If the thought of discussing sexual fantasies with your partner makes you uncomfortable, then that may also be why there is a passion problem.
There are great self- help books on market, and last but not least there is couples counseling.
What are your thoughts on the importance of passion in a relationship? Passion in a relationship is not just about sex, it is about an overall feeling and desire towards your partner, and each other. Do you think one can have a happy, fulfilling relationship without passion? Please share your story or experience!
“Does your relationship match your sensuality? If it doesn't, you've settled.” - Lebo Grand
Physical Attraction VS Mental Connection...Are They Equally Important?
It is not usual for someone to see a person, and instantly have a mental connection with them. Most people are visual, so physical attraction is often what piques our romantic, or sexual interest in another person.
Physical attraction often comes first, but there are times when a mental connection can happen almost instantly, or so I have been told.
Mental connections can occasionally be confused with strong physical attractions. You can desire a person so much that you create a mental and emotional connection in your mind that really doesn’t exist.
Once the sexual act occurs, or the attraction wears off, the mental connection “suddenly” leaves.
Physical attractions are honestly an everyday occurrence. There are attractive people everywhere, but good luck finding a deep mental connection with someone. They are rare, and they are special.
Physical Attraction
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Physical attraction is based on physical appearance, and how attractive you find another person. Physical attraction is about a pretty or handsome face, or a nice figure or sexy body. You desire them. You want them. You like the sound of their voice, the way they move their body, and even the way they smell.
Signs Of Physical Attraction
Big Smiles
Nervousness
Grooming
Touching
Lots Of Eye Contact
Mental Connection
Mental connection is not mutually exclusive from physical attraction, but it is so much more. A mental connection is about shared interests, similar intellect, and chemistry. You get one another, and just click.
Mentally you feel close to them, and you have a quiet, unspoken understanding about many things. You can communicate with your eyes, because with your mental connection, you often know what the other person is thinking or feeling.
Signs Of A Mental Connection
Conversation Is Effortless
You’re Comfortable Being Yourself With Each Other
You Can Read Each Other
There Is An Intensity To The Relationship
You Feel In Sync With One Another
You Share A Powerful Mutual Respect
Which Is Better?
Physical attraction is important, and the importance of being physically attracted to your partner should not be discounted. However, the challenge with physical attraction is the inevitable change of physical appearance over time.
We all age, and gravity will wreak some havoc on the body. If a relationship was primarily based on physical attraction, then the partners will surely become dissatisfied in the long run.
Mental connections usually take time to flesh out. A mental connection is not noticed from across the room, and usually happens only after interactions, and getting to know someone. It should be noted that a mental connection may also be realized after just one conversation.
In my opinion, mental connections win every time. Physical attraction is important, but looks fade. Also I have found that how I felt about someone as a person directly affected how I viewed their attractiveness.
I have met men in the past, and at the initial meeting I found them to be attractive. After getting to know them, I became turned off by their personalities, or lack of intelligence, and no longer found them attractive.
With mental connections, people can become more attractive. The deeper the connection, the greater the attraction. Mental connections often create love goggles, which prevents one from seeing physical flaws that they would normally zone in on, because they are so in love.
For me, it comes down to who would I want to spend the rest of my days with. Do I want someone who I find very attractive, but have little or no mental connection. Or do I want to be with someone I have an amazing mental connection with? I think the answer is obvious, but I believe it also depends on where you are at in your life.
What are your thoughts on mental connection versus physical attraction. Which do you value more? Please share your story or experience!
“Physical attractions are common, but a mental connection is rare. Once you’ve had the latter, the former will never be enough” - Unknown
All The Ways You Are Sabotaging Your Relationships
You say you want a relationship, but the minute you are in one you tend to do things to end it. It is a pattern repeated all too often by you. You are a self-saboteur, and relationship destroyer. If you find yourself entering relationships with high hopes, only for it to crash and burn unexpectedly, time and time again, it may be time for some self-analysis.
There are many reasons people will sabotage a relationship, but fear is usually the number one culprit. Fear of being of alone, and fear of rejection. Sounds weird, right? You fear being alone, so you do things in relationships that make you end up alone.
It’s about protecting your heart, and self-preservation. Unfortunately, you may lose out on a great relationship, maybe even the love of your life, due to your sabotaging.
Perhaps after reading this blog, you won’t stop sabotaging your relationships, but at least you will be aware of the signs when you are doing it.
The Ways You Are Sabotaging Your Relationship
Unrealistic Expectations
Did you really think that you would continue having sex twice a day, every day, for your entire relationship? Sex is a very important part of a relationship, but it is unrealistic to think that your sex life would not change over the course of your relationship, for many different reasons.
If you find yourself unhappy with the frequency of sex in your relationship you need to make your feelings known, in a thoughtful, non-accusatory manner.
Did you think your partner would not age, or that their body wouldn’t change over the years, especially after having kids? Completely unrealistic, shallow, and possibly indicative that you are not truly in love if you hyper-focus on your partner’s aging, or gaining a few pounds over the years.
Comparing Your Relationship To Others
If there is one thing that I have learned over the years, it is that things and people are not often what they seems to be. People tend to have a public and private persona, and that goes for couples as well. Some couples can seem so loving and perfect in public, and may be a hot mess behind closed doors.
It is often after couples split that truths come out, and only then do we realize we were trying to live up to an illusion.
Focus on your relationship. Live your best happy. No one’s relationship is perfect. Your relationship may be amazing, or it may completely suck. Either way, your thoughts and feelings about your relationship should be based on how your relationship makes you feel about yourself, and how it makes you feel about your partner.
Not Communicating Your Feelings
While we sometimes assume or wish our partners were mind readers, they are not. If something in your relationship is bothering you, or upsetting you, you need to speak up, and let your partner know. They cannot fix a problem they are unaware of.
Yes, there are times when it should be obvious, at least to you, that something they do or say is not okay with you. But remember, they are not you.
If your partner is constantly doing and saying things that annoy or anger you, tell them. If it continues, it may be time to move on.
Keeping Secrets
Whether you sneak the occasional cigarette or hide purchases from your partner, eventually you will be caught, and the issue of trust will come up. Do you need share every single thought or desire that comes to mind, I would say not necessarily, but keeping secrets in a relationship can be dangerous.
The gauge I recommend using regarding whether or not you are keeping a secret is to think about how your partner would feel about the information you are not sharing. If you are withholding information from your partner because you think they would be hurt, angry, or feel betrayed, then you are keeping secrets.
Being Selfish
It’s all about you, all the time. It has to be your way, and if it is not, temper tantrums, and bouts of sulking will commence. Does that sound familiar? We all want to have things our own way. We all have our own wants, desires, and preferences, but in a relationship sometimes you don’t get your preference.
Relationships require compromise, and sometimes that compromise may mean doing what your partner wants. If you choose your partner wisely, their wants and desires will closely align with yours. If you chose an opposite, or someone pretty different, be prepared for a lot of compromise, or to be completely selfish.
Relationships are challenging, and require work to maintain a healthy one. Not every relationship will work out, or is meant to be, but is important give yourself an opportunity to truly be happy. If the right person comes into your life, don’t sabotage things because you are afraid. Life is short and there are no guarantees, but taking a risk for a chance of happiness will be worth it every time.
What are your thoughts on sabotaging relationships? Do you agree with my list? Are you a self-saboteur? Please share your story or experience!
“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
The Science Of Soulmates...Explained By Spooky Quantum Entanglement
Did I pique your interest just a little bit with the title? I mean after all, aren’t the terms soulmate and spooky quantum entanglement interesting topics to say the least? I am a romantic, and a bit of a nerd, so this combination of topics are most certainly up my alley.
I have a particular fascination with time, and whether or not it truly moves linearly, or if it even exists at all. This blog is all about time, and soulmates, and spooky quantum entanglement.
This is where romance and love, meets science and the possibilities of the impossible.
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The Defined
Many of the terms and their definitions used in this blog are complex, arguable, and not easily defined, but in my simplest terms, and Wikipedia’s, here you go.
Time
Time is the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole. The truth of the matter is that time is a human concept, which is purely subjective.
We use clocks and devices as a means of tracking time, but how slow or fast, and in which direction time moves is individual. We all experience time differently.
The true meaning of soulmate is to have known and loved one another in many lives. Death does not separate true love, and soulmates will always find their way back to one another. The modern definition of soulmate is more simplistic.
Soulmates are two people who are drawn to each other, and connect on every level. There is an intensity and passion between soulmates that is difficult, if not impossible, to replicate. Very science-y right?
Spooky Quantum Entanglement
Spooky quantum entanglement is a physical phenomenon which occurs when pairs or groups of particles are generated, interact, or share spatial proximity in ways such that the quantum state of each particle cannot be described independently of the state of the other(s), even when the particles are separated by a large distance—instead, a quantum state must be described for the system as a whole. - Wikipedia
Mind blown, right? Spooky quantum entanglement is not for the faint of heart, or the easily confused.
The Intertwined
Everything is made of particles, and that includes human beings. With the knowledge that humans beings are made of particles, and applying the theory of spooky quantum entanglement, can we not see the possibility of the connection of two people, via their particles.
Whether they are sitting right next to one another, or in different cities, they are connected and their bodies can react to one another’s. They are soulmates in every way possible.
Soulmates may not physically be together, whether the separation is due to geographical distance, other relationships, or different timelines keeping them apart, the pull still exists.
Think back on all of those times you would feel happy, or sad, or your heart would just start racing for some unexplained reason. Those were the times you were feeling most connected to your soulmate.
You were feeling each other’s emotions. You were reacting to and mimicking the joys, and the emotional and physical pains of your soulmate.
The Belief
What do you call that feeling when you meet someone for the first time, but you feel like you have known them before? Something about them is familiar. Or what about when you keep running into the same person over and over again, as if something, the universe perhaps, is pulling you two together?
We have created all of these terms to explain away the mysterious. We call events coincidence and refer to some experiences as deja vu, but are they really? It’s more comfortable to dismiss and explain away, then it is to question and challenge the accepted.
Some might say that I am oversimplifying one of the universe’s most complex mysteries. Maybe I am, but that does not make it any less of a possibility.
If you believe like I do that nothing is ever truly gone, just changed in form, then you must believe that distance, time, and not even death can separate two people who are connected by the very fiber of their beings.
This blog is a combination of research, fiction writing, and my own personal theories. I am neither a scientist nor a mathematician, but the facts remain that there is more of the unexplained in our universe than there is of the explainable. Do you think I am wrong? Prove it…
“Our universe grants every soul a twin—a reflection of themselves—the kindred spirit – And no matter where they are or how far away they are from each other—even if they are in different dimensions, they will always find one another. This is destiny; this is love.” – Julie Dillon
6 Signs You Have Outgrown Your Relationship
As the years go by, we grow and we change. Our wants and desires from 10 years ago may be vastly different than what they are today. It is inevitable. Life happens, priorities change, and as we gain insight and knowledge, our world view changes as well.
Unfortunately, sometimes our growth can negatively impact relationships in our lives, especially romantic relationships. The guy or girl that you were at 25 is not the same person at 35. You basically outgrow people in your life, including romantic partners.
If you are reading this, chances are you have already realized that you have outgrown your partner, but are looking for some definitive signs. Here are the six signs that you have outgrown your relationship.
6 Signs You Have Outgrown Your Relationship
Your Priorities Are Different
She is an ambitious, career focused money saver, while he prefers to focus on his hobbies, spend money like there is a never ending pot of money, and bounces from job to job. While once on the same page, one person has grown and become focused, while the other partner has become stagnant.
Your Interests Are Different
He is a political junkie and a huge Star Wars fan, while she is into reality television and fashion. He wants to talk about the upcoming election, and she is not even a registered voter. There is a problem here.
At some point these two people became polar opposites, and started to lack commonality. One is interested in world events, while the other is interested in looking cute and taking selfies.
Nothing To Talk About
You know that you have outgrown each other when you really have nothing to talk about, or it is the same old stories over and over.
It important to recognize that you have nothing to talk about because you have nothing in common, and you have nothing in common because you have outgrown each other.
You’re Bored
If you find your partner boring, you have outgrown them. The truth is that you find them boring because you now share different interests, are on a different intellectual levels, and no commonality any longer.
Different Values
Once upon a time you were both drinkers and into going out a lot. Now she’s a homebody, but he still likes to drink and go out a lot. She also likes to attend church, but he is a non believer.
Lifestyle and differing religious beliefs are big changes that happen as we grow and mature.
Different Goals
His goal is to have a nice family life with a few kids, while her goal is retire by 50 and then travel world. She doesn’t see kids in her future, and views them as a burden, while he sees children as a blessing.
It is hard to admit to yourself that you have outgrown your relationship without sounding like you are criticizing your partner or being judgey, but it is what it is. You should not feel guilty because you have grown and changed, especially if your growth has been for the better.
What are your thoughts on outgrowing relationships? Do you agree with the signs? When you outgrow a relationship do you stick it out or move on? Please share your experience!
“Sometimes the door closes on a relationship, not because we failed but because something bigger than us says this no longer fits our life. So, lock the door, shed a tear, turn around and look for the new door that’s opened. It’s a sign that you’re no longer that person you were, it’s time to change into who you are. It’s going to be okay.” - Lee Goff
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First Date Conversation Starters
First dates can either be super fun and cute, or crazy awkward and uncomfortable. There’s usually not a whole lot of in between. I equate a first date to a job interview. You are nervous, but trying to project confidence, and make a good first impression.
There are literally thousands of questions you could ask your date, but remember your goal, and remember that you are also being interviewed for a possible date number two as well.
The goal is to get to know enough about them on the first date to make a determination of basic compatibility, which is the decider for a second date.
I chose the below questions for the first date because I think they are safe, non controversial questions that give you enough intel about your date, but shouldn’t creep them out. You do not want to make them feel like they are being interrogated, or like they being interviewed to be a sperm donor.
The first date questions should be light and fun, but also informative.
First Date Conversation Starters
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1. Where are you from originally?
Many adults move for education and for work, so there is a good chance your date is not a local native. Depending on the part of the country someone is from, or if they were born and raised outside the US, it really shapes the person they are.
2. Where did you go to school?
Asking about his school will give him an opportunity to humble brag, and for you to learn about his educational background and career. Alma Mater pride talk is always fun.
3. What are you favorite things to do?
The purpose of this question is to find commonality. If he enjoys spending his weekends antiquing and visiting art galleries, while you spend your weekends surfing and camping, you are probably not a good fit.
But you also find out that you both love doing the same things, which makes planning a second date a no-brainer.
4. Do you have pets?
Is he a cat lover or dog lover, or hates animals altogether? Sounds like no a big deal, but it would be if the relationship progressed.
It’s great to find out early that your potential mate is allergic to cats, and you have two cats at home.
5. What’s your favorite form of entertainment? Books? Music? Movies?
I do not necessarily consider any answers to these questions deal breakers, and you do not need to have everything in common with a mate, but it is nice when you share similar taste in music and movies.
6. What is your guilty pleasure?
This is just a fun question, and a test to see how much they are willing to open up, and possibly a peek into their silly side. We all have a guilty pleasure, but will they admit to theirs?
There’s nothing wrong with being a terrible singer and loving karaoke.
7. What really annoys you?
Some people find large crowds annoying, while others would rather not interact with children or animals.
It might be helpful to know that their pet peeve is people who are indecisive, especially if you know that is one of your main quirks.
8. Who is your favorite entertainer?
The answer to this question should be very telling, and it should spark lively conversation. Is he open to fun banter and disagreement about who is the best singer, actor, writer, or musician, or does his opinion have to rule?
Be sure to keep the conversation natural, and space your questions out over the course of your time together. Hopefully you will find these questions helpful on your next first date, but remember that while you are asking these questions you are also trying to determine if you and your date have good chemistry.
What is your experience with first dates? Do you agree with my list of conversation staters? What questions would you ask on a first date? Please share your experience!
“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, falling in love with you was beyond my control.” - Gwen
20 Favorite Quotes About Letting Go and Moving On...
I love a good quote. All good things come to an end, or so I have been told. Whether you are an optimist or a realist, death or circumstance will force the endings to jobs, relationships, and sadly life.
Nothing lasts forever, no matter how much we wished they did sometimes. The challenge comes with letting go, and moving on.
For this blog I picked 20 old and new favorite quotes about moving on and letting go. Some are sweet, some are sad, but they all reflect the importance of letting go in order to be able to move forward. Once you are able to move on, you will have a chance of being happy again.
My 20 Favorite Letting Go And Moving On Quotes
“I think it happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you've known forever don't see things the way you do. And so you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on.”
― Nicholas Sparks, True Believer
“We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”– Joseph Campbell
“When it comes to love and loss, acceptance is never easy. We can't make someone see all we have to give, make them love us, or make them change. All we can do is move on and stop wasting time.” ― April Mae Monterrosa
“Sometimes the hardest part isn’t letting go but rather learning to start over.”– Nicole Sobon
“Don't tie your heart to a person that has nothing left to offer you. Let it go. It might hurt for a while, but when you get over it, you'll see that its better.” ― Orebela Gbenga
”Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.”– Herman Hesse
“The only real battle in life is between hanging on and letting go.” ― Shannon L. Alder
“You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could've, would've happened... or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.” ― Tupac Shakur
“Holding on is believing that there’s only a past; letting go is knowing that there’s a future.” – Daphne Rose Kingman
“Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.”– Deborah Reber
“Letting go does not mean you stop caring. It means you stop trying to force others to.” – Mandy Hale
“Lots of things can be fixed. Things can be fixed. But many times, relationships between people cannot be fixed, because they should not be fixed. You're aboard a ship setting sail, and the other person has joined the inland circus, or is boarding a different ship, and you just can't be with each other anymore. Because you shouldn't be.” ― C. JoyBell C.
“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.” – Ann Lander
“Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it's only good for wallowing in.” ― Katherine Mansfield
“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” - Raymond Lindquist
“The great courageous act that we must all do, is to have the courage to step out of our history and past so that we can live our dreams.” ― Oprah Winfrey
“In the process of letting go, you will lose many things from the past, but you will find yourself.”
- Deepak Chopra
“The secret to life is to have no fear. When you can let go of what others think about you, how something is going to turn out, or how your past will affect your future, then you are finally living life free.” ― Shannon L. Alder
“Rejection is one of the worse forms of pain. Loss is the worst. Grief haunts until you allow yourself to move on.” ― Angelica Hopes
“Sometimes the door closes on a relationship, not because we failed but because something bigger than us says this no longer fits our life. So, lock the door, shed a tear, turn around and look for the new door that’s opened. It’s a sign that you’re no longer that person you were, it’s time to change into who you are. It’s going to be okay.” - Lee Goff
Quotes about letting go and moving on are supposed to be inspirational, supportive, and encouraging. Have you ever found it difficult to let go and move on, and but some good advice helped you? Please share moving on advice or favorite quotes!
Love At First Sight...Is It Possible?
Love at first sight is a phenomenon. You see someone across a crowded room and feel an instant connection and a gut feeling that this person is who you were meant to be with.
Fortunately, luck would have it that the one you fell in love with at first sight just so happens to be hot or gorgeous. No coincidence there, right?
Love, at first sight, is rare, but do you believe it can actually happen? Many will poo poo the concept of love at first sight, and rightfully so, in my opinion.
I mean after all, what could we possibly know about someone after just one sighting or meeting? But others are firm believers that it can happen, mainly because it has happened to them.
Movies and literature would have you believe that love at first happens all of the time and will lead to a “happily ever after” ending.
I mean, after all, didn’t Cinderella get her glass slipper after just one encounter? A moment in time can be wonderful, but what happens when reality sets in?
Is Love At First Sight Possible?
Reasons To Believe In Love At First Sight
Instant Attraction
Amazing Chemistry
Soulmates
Gut Feeling
Reasons To Not Believe In Love At First Sight
Based Solely On Physical Attributes
Unknown Commonality
Masks Are Still On
You Can’t Love What You Do Not Know
I have often heard love at first sight referred to as “lust” at first sight, and I have to agree. While I have personally never felt like I have fallen in love with someone at first sight, I have had that instant attraction.
I have experienced seeing someone from across the room and feeling a strong emotion as our eyes met. The next time our paths crossed we hit it off and dated for a couple of years. Was it love at first sight? No, it was not love because I didn’t know him, I desired him. Big difference in my opinion.
Would it surprise you to know that more than 50 percent of people believe in love at first sight? It surprised me quite honestly. It just goes to show how much we link feelings of love to physical attraction, at least initially. I say initially because we tend to find people more or less attractive as we get to know them, which I think disproves the possibility of love at first.
What I believe can happen is that an initial attraction and fascination can grow and turn into everlasting love.
What are your thoughts on love at first sight? Are you a believer or a cynic? Has it ever happened to you? Can it be love at first sight if the feeling is only one-sided? Please share your story and experience!
“I meant it when I said I didn’t believe in love at first sight. It takes time to really, truly fall for someone. Yet I believe in a moment. A moment when you glimpse the truth within someone, and they glimpse the truth within you. In that moment, you don’t belong to yourself any longer, not completely. Part of you belongs to him; part of him belongs to you. After that, you can’t take it back, no matter how much you want to, no matter how hard you try.” - Claudia Gray, A Thousand Pieces Of You
Photo by freestocks.org from Pexels
7 Signs He Is Too Possessive In Your Relationship
In relationships there are many feelings felt besides love. Sometimes there is hurt, anger, jealousy, and possessiveness. When someone is jealous they are fiercely protective and watchful over something or someone they believe to be their possession.
Jealousy happens to the best of us occasionally.
I admit that I have felt the sting of jealousy a time or two in a relationship, but I do not consider myself to be a jealous person in general. When I reflect on the times in my past when I have felt jealous, it was due to feelings of insecurity in those relationships.
People tend feel jealous and insecure in relationships where there are issues of trust, and uncertainty of where you stand.
Possessiveness is not the same as jealousy. Possessiveness in a relationship consists of jealousy, but taken up a few notches. Someone who is possessive is demanding, controlling, and jealous to the extreme. They are also master manipulators, and great at making you feel like crap for questioning their methods and motives.
The Signs He Is Too Possessive
He's Controlling
He has to decide the when, where, and how for most of your activities. He wants to have a say so in your friends and who you hang out with. He tries to tell you how to dress, and even tells you how to act.
He Asks For Passwords
He wants the passwords for your email and social media accounts for your safety and well being of course, or so he says. Whether or not he is willing to share his passwords, the answer to this request should be no. This request is about trust and control.
He Smothers
He gives you no space or personal time. He acts like you are joined at the hip and wants to go everywhere with you. It is never healthy for couples to do everything together, and have no life outside of the relationship. But in the case of the possessive guy, he wants to be with you all of the time so he can keep an eye on you.
You're On Call
He has to know where you are at at all times, and if he calls or texts you and you do not immediately answer or respond he freaks out, and the accusations start. He is quick to accuse you of not loving him, not appreciating him, and cheating too. Remember, he is the master manipulator.
He Stalks
He checks your social media and shows up where you are at just to make sure you are where you said you would be. The possessive man obsesses about who you are talking to and what you are doing behind his back. He will watch and stalk you both physically and electronically.
He Doesn't Respect Boundaries
He goes through your personal things, including your purse, your phone, and your drawers. He goes through anything that he thinks you might be able hide something from him. If you are hiding something, you better hide it well.
He Just Loves You So Much
He justifies his controlling, possessive behavior by constantly telling you he is doing it because just loves you "so much". He makes a habit of making you feel guilty for wanting your privacy, your own space, and wanting to make your own decisions.
Jealousy and possessiveness are not the same things. Jealousy is a natural feeling that we all have at some point in time, and can be take too far if we let it. But possessiveness on the other hand is unhealthy, damaging, and dangerous to relationships.
What are your thoughts on jealousy and possessiveness in relationships? Have you ever been in a relationship where you felt extreme jealousy or possessiveness? What was the outcome? Please share your experience!
"Jealousy in romance is like salt in food. A little can enhance the savor, but too much can spoil the pleasure and, under certain circumstances, can be life-threatening." - Maya Angelou