5 Binge Worthy Shows To Stream In The New Year
Winter is now upon us and the quarantine and pandemic precautions continue for many of us around the world. As we stay inside to stay warm and to stay healthy, we need something to occupy our time. I am all about a good book, but I am also all about a great Netflix and Amazon Prime Video binge.
Here’s what worth a watch this new year on Netflix and Amazon Prime Video.
The Expanse
In the 24th century, a disparate band of antiheroes unravels a vast conspiracy that threatens the Solar System's fragile state of cold war.
The Expanse is one of my favorite shows and on December 16th the series is back for its fifth season. There are 10 episodes this season but unlike last season where all 10 episodes were dropped at once, only the first 3 episodes are available immediately and the rest will premiere each Wednesday. Although not a total binge for the current season, there are four other seasons to catch up on.
The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Part 4
As her 16th birthday nears, Sabrina must choose between the witch world of her family and the human world of her friends. Based on the Archie comic.
The fourth and final season of the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina returns on December 31st. This is a fun, dark show that is sure to send some chills and thrills your way this winter.
Lucifer
Lucifer Morningstar has decided he's had enough of being the dutiful servant in Hell and decides to spend some time on Earth to better understand humanity. He settles in Los Angeles - the City of Angels.
I came late to the Lucifer fandom. I never watched it on network television, but once it was recommended to me on Netflix I gave it a try and was lured in by Lucifer’s cheeky charm. The second half of season 5, part 2, is returning to Netflix soon, but until that time all 5 1/2 seasons are currently available for binging.
Bridgerton
Wealth, lust, and betrayal set in the backdrop of Regency-era England, seen through the eyes of the powerful Bridgerton family.
I am a sucker for a period piece and I love a great romance, especially Regency. Bridgerton is new from Shonda Rhimes and it’s based on Julia Quinn's novels with the popular anonymous gossip columnist Lady Whistledown. I read all of these books well over a decade ago, but never forgot them.
Watch the Bridgerton series bring Julia Quinn’s novels to life with a Shonda Rhimes twist on Netflix beginning December 25th.
The Boys
A group of vigilantes set out to take down corrupt superheroes who abuse their superpowers.
The Boys is an Amazon Prime Video original. If violence, sex, action, and foul language is your thing, then this is the show for you. One of the best lines and takeaways from this show is “don’t mistake nice for good”. Life lessons in the harshest way possible is what this show offers, in a fun, action-packed, kick-ass way.
Two seasons are currently available to watch. So binge-worthy!
All of the above shows are perfect for an anytime binge watch. You cannot go wrong with any of these so pick one to start watching. I do no think you will be disappointed.
Signs You’re The Third Wheel In Your Relationship
Feeling invisible or like you are being left out is a terrible feeling. A third wheel is someone who is unnecessary to a group and is tagging along. In this case, the group usually consists of a couple and the third, superfluous person.
Whether you are dating or married, sometimes you can be made to feel like a third wheel in your own relationship. Your spouse’s relatives, friends, and co-workers may come around and suddenly you feel as though you have become invisible to your partner.
Whether or not this is actually the case or just your own jealousies and insecurities messing with your head, there are signs to look for.
3 Signs You’re The Third Wheel In Your Relationship
Inside Jokes
Nothing can make you feel like a third wheel faster than sitting with two people, even if one of them is your partner and they are talking in code or have a bunch of inside jokes.
Inside jokes show closeness and when you are not in on the joke you feel like an outsider looking in on your own relationship.
Left Out Of Plans
Doing things without you or making plans without you when you feel you should be included is hurtful and a clear indication that you are a third wheel.
Your partner should most certainly be able to have friends outside of the relationship, but when you share mutual friends and are excluded from plans it’s a clear sign of you becoming the third wheel.
You Feel Like A Third Wheel
When you hang out with your husband and his family, his friends, or his co-workers, people you also feel like you have good relationships with, but feel like your presence wouldn’t be missed, you’re the third wheel.
It’s the feeling that your presence is only being tolerated because of your connection to your significant other.
What To Do If You Are The Third Wheel
The important thing to understand is that your partner is allowed to have friends and hobbies outside of your relationship. You don’t have to do everything together. Having said that, how you go about addressing the third wheel situation will depend on who’s involved, the relationships, and the frequency.
Communication is key. Ask your partner if they would rather do something without you and be okay with their answer being yes. But be honest about how it makes you feel and what you are and are not comfortable with.
I’m not saying to never do things with others. Attend your partner’s holiday party to show support and his family’s get together for solidarity, but let him hang with his family or friends sometimes without you too. And you should do the same.
What are your thoughts on recognizing the third wheel situation happening in your relationship? Have you ever felt like the third wheel in your relationship? Please share your thought and experience!
“There is something demoralizing about watching two people get more and more crazy about each other, especially when you are the only extra person in the room. It's like watching Paris from an express caboose heading in the opposite direction--every second the city gets smaller and smaller, only you feel it's really you getting smaller and smaller and lonelier and lonelier, rushing away from all those lights and excitement at about a million miles an hour.” ― Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar
The Benefits of Meditation
If you had told five years ago that someday daily meditation would be part of my life, I would have said you don’t know me very well. Yet here I am now, practicing meditation daily and finding peace in my heart and mind that I never thought possible.
Meditation is a practice where an individual uses a technique such as mindfulness or focusing the mind on a particular object, thought, or activity - to train attention and awareness, and achieve a mentally clear and emotionally calm and stable state. - Wikipedia
The thought of meditation may sound silly to some, I know that’s how it sounded to me not too many years ago. But if you are someone who is finding yourself consistently stressed, tired, unhappy with life, or unable to focus, give daily meditation a try for a week and see if you still find it silly after giving it try.
The Basics of Meditating
The practice of meditation is simple and calming and can be done just about anywhere. The basics of meditation are finding a place to be able to sit quietly, close your eyes, and focus on your breathing.
When I meditate I like to have the lights low. I sit on the floor in a quiet room, with a small blanket under my tailbone, and with my legs in the crossed position. I close my eyes and take deep slow breaths, as I clear my mind.
When I first started meditating, I would do it for about five minutes, which honestly felt like forever. Now I meditate for twenty minutes or more and the time flies. I stand up from meditation and crawl into bed, completely relaxed, at peace, and ready to sleep.
The Benefits of Meditation
Relieves Stress
Life can be very stressful. Whether you are a student, a parent, or a boss, the demands on us in our daily lives can feel overwhelming. Just ten minutes, or three minutes if that’s all you have, can help bring calm, center you, and help you refocus your thoughts and reduce your stress level.
Helps With Sleep
I am an insomniac. I have struggled with sleep for years, which is why I choose to meditate before bedtime. Meditation is very calming and brings down your blood pressure, slows your heart rate, and gets your body ready for a good night’s rest if sleep is your goal.
Relaxing
Meditation is about quieting your mind and getting rid of all the brain chatter that prevents you from being able to decompress and relax. When you center yourself, focus on your breathing, and shutout all those other thoughts, you will feel your body soften as you began to relax.
Helps You Focus
Meditation promotes thoughtfulness. If you have a project or an important event coming up, meditation will help you clear your mind and focus. As you close your eyes and quiet your mind, breathe slowly as you allow your mind to gently focus on the specific topic.
Brings You Peace
The practice of meditation can clear both your head and your heart. When you are able to clear your heart and mind, you are able to make space for love, gratitude, and peace.
I am by no means a meditation expert or Zen master, but I can speak to how meditation has changed my spirit, how it has changed my stress levels, and how it has changed my life for the better. I work on my Zen daily and focus on inner peace.
What are your thoughts on meditation? Do you practice meditation? If so, how does it benefit you? Please share your thoughts and experience with meditation!
How To Have A Stress Free Thanksgiving
I love Thanksgiving, and I am truly thankful for all of my good fortunes. When I think of Thanksgiving, I think of food, family, friends, and football. I know that for many, holiday time can be stressful or depressing, but for me I feel like this is when I really shine.
It really is not about how big, or small your crowd is, but about appreciating how wonderful things are, and hopes of better things to come. My crowd size varies from year year, from as small as six people, to as large as twenty. Personally for me, ten people is the most comfortable size for me to cook for.
This year I am doing something a little different. I am hosting a pre-dinner the Wednesday before at one home to spend time with those who will not be with us on Thanksgiving.
Then on the actual day of, I will host another Thanksgiving with some different guests at a different house. The menus will be different, as will the locations and ambience, which makes it more interesting for me.
I used to get very stressed out cooking for the holidays, wanting everything to be perfect. But those years are long gone. I am pretty confident in my abilities, but can also shrug it off if something doesn’t turn outright. I also don’t try to go it alone.
My two daughters are awesome sous chefs, which helps a lot. I love teaching my girls to cook, and seeing that growth from year to year.
So while my holiday menus are mostly decided, I am now teetering between a roasted or fried turkey. For a while there, I was really on a fried turkey kick, and then I was over it.
In the last three years, I roasted the turkeys, brined for 48 hours before cooking, and they were delicious. But it may be time for a change-up again. Either way, I plan on a stress-free Thanksgiving.
Here Are My Tips For A Stress Thanksgiving...
Plan Ahead - Once you know how many people you will be hosting, start planning seating, your menu, and beverages.
Make Ahead - Many dishes, especially desserts and appetizers can be made ahead of time.
Enlist Help - Have you kids, partner, or friends assist as needed with food prep, serving, and clean up.
Bring A Dish - When entertaining large groups, have guests bring side dishes, desserts, or beverages.
Perfection Not Required - Remember the gathering is about being together and giving thanks.
Size Doesn't Matter - Whether your celebration consists of 2 or 20 people, you have something to be thankful for.
What are your holiday plans? Hosting a dinner? Attending someone else's dinner as a guest? Or going out for a nice steak dinner at a restaurant? Please share your plans and tips for having a wonderful, stress free Thanksgiving!
When you practice gratefulness, there is a sense of respect towards others. - Dalai Lama
5 Benefits Of Waiting To Have Sex
The dating game and how we find a mate has changed over time, but the fundamentals of the heart and human desire remain the same. The importance of sexual intimacy is different for everyone, and the weight placed on the act of sex in or out of relationships varies vastly from person to person depending on age, gender, upbringing, and religious beliefs.
I think many people, women in particular, struggle with the decision of when to sleep with a man. What is considered too soon to sleep with a guy you just met or just started dating? Is it okay to sleep with him on the first date or do I wait until after the fifth date? The truth is there is no right answer.
This blog is not about slut-shaming, but it is about thinking about how early intimacy can affect future relationship possibilities and how it may be more beneficial to wait depending on your own relationship goals.
The Benefits of Waiting To Have Sex
Takes Away The Pressure
The first time with a new partner can be exciting, but it can also be filled with nervousness and pressure. If this is someone who you barely know, and you want a second date, you may feel pressure to be more exciting or kinkier than you normally would be in bed to try to secure a second date.
If you establish your own personal rule that you are not putting out until the fifth or tenth date, you will feel less anxious and pressure because by that point you have a pretty good idea that you like him and he likes you.
Get To Know Each Other
Taking the time to get to really get to know the new guy in your life if you are looking for a long term relationship and love is the most important part of dating. Figuring out if you share commonality, chemistry, and life goals will be the determining factor if he may be the one or if seeing him again would be a waste of time.
Creates Mystery
Your relationship will eventually move to the bedroom, but until that time, you get to enjoy all of the flirting and fantasizing as the sexual tension builds up. The bedroom action for the first time is the big reveal, but some women allow everything to peak too soon in the relationship and the romance fizzles out quickly.
Changes Relationship Focus
Once sex is off the table, temporarily, of course, it allows the relationship to grow organically and for two people to get to know each other. Sex is great, but it can also be a distracter and become the focus of the relationship in the early stages, especially if it is good sex.
You may think that a relationship with a focus on good sex is not a bad thing, but if a young relationship is all about sex, it’s not much of a relationship, and not likely to last.
You Know He Likes You For You
If you have gone out with a guy six times and there has been no sex, chances are he keeps coming back for you because he likes you. But when a guy keeps coming back after you slept with him on the first date or when you first met him, maybe wasn’t even a date, you can’t be sure if he likes you or is just using you.
I am not advocating for “no sex” before marriage, in fact, I strongly encourage sampling and making a determination of sexual compatibility before making a lifelong commitment to someone. What I am saying is to maybe reconsider sleeping with a guy too soon if you are looking for a long term relationship. However, if you are just looking for a good time and no strings then do your thing.
What are your thoughts on waiting to have sex in a new relationship? Do you think it matters? Does becoming intimate too early in a new relationship sabotage future possibilities? Please share your thoughts and experience!
“We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.” - Tim Robbins
What To Do Before Before Your Peloton Arrives
Once you make the big decision to purchase your Peloton, it can feel like an eternity waiting for it to arrive. The Peloton bike is more popular than ever before since the pandemic struck, keeping many of us at home and closing down gyms.
Searching for workout alternatives led many, including me, to the pricey yet perfect option of the Peloton bike. While you anxiously wait to meet your beautiful machine, there are many things to do in the meantime in preparation and to get your body moving.
Create Your Home Gym Space
One of the things that make the Peloton bike perfect for your home gym is the fact that it does not take up a lot of space. The Peloton bike is five feet long and two feet wide, so it is essentially perfect for tucking into a small space if that is all you have.
I suggest, if you have the room, that you bring in a mat for your bike and yoga mat for workouts. Also, consider adding space for free weights to the area, as well as storage for resistance bands, workout towels, and storage for your cycling shoes.
Download Peloton App
Once you purchase your bike, you are immediately given access to the Pelton app and all of the workouts. You will need to set up your account. You need to select your profile user name and password and start getting familiar with the app on your phone, tablet, or by utilizing your online account.
Your user name can be as unique as you want it to be, and once set up, you can search for any friends you have on Peloton as well. Follow friends or other Peloton members to get inspired or motivated.
Work Out With Peloton
Just because you don’t have your bike yet that doesn’t mean you can’t get your fitness on. Peloton offers just as many workouts off the bike as they do on the bike, and no matter your age, your interests, or fitness level, there is something for everyone.
Peleton offers breakout workouts for strength training, yoga, meditation, stretching, boot camps, and cardio. The cardio breaks out further into HIIT, outdoor running, outdoor walking, barre, and dancing. You also have the option of taking live classes or recorded classes so you can take your favorite classes over and over again.
Get Familiar With The Trainers
Every trainer brings a different vibe and personality to their class and you want to find the vibe that suits you best. So far I have found that all the Peloton trainers are great, but my standout favorites are Chelsea Jackson Roberts and Robin Arzon. Of course, I’m still new to Peloton so I’m sure as I take more classes I will find that other trainers bring out my best as well.
Are you excited about a future with a Peloton bike? I know the price is high so if that is a concern, you can go with the classic bike which is $1895, with monthly payments option of just $49. Or you can choose the Peloton Bike + which is priced at $2495, with a monthly payment option of $64 monthly. I highly recommend it, it will change your life. Use my Referral Code JXDMTG today to save $100 when you purchase your Peloton.
10 Best Ways To Destress and Clear Your Mind
For many people, life feels more stressful now than ever before. The feelings of uncertainty, instability, and vulnerability weigh heavy on many hearts and minds daily, so being able to manage your stress level, and clear your mind to focus and think is a much-needed tool to make it through tough times.
Life is stressful, and while a certain amount of stress is normal and healthy, too much stress can cause serious physical and mental issues.
Unfortunately, there is no magical cure to make all of your problems and worries go away, but there are things you can do to help you cope better.
10 Ways To Destress and Clear Your Mind
Play With A Pet
Animals are wonderful stress relievers. They are loving, and affectionate, and can really be your best friend. If you don’t have a pet, head to the animal shelters and consider giving a home to an animal in need. It’s a win-win decision.
Go For A Walk
Getting outside into the fresh air can do wonders for clearing your head and destressing. The sunshine and vitamin D will almost instantly improve your mood.
Focus On Or Find A Hobby
Hobbies are fun, relaxing, and a great way to spend your free time. Maybe your hobby is bird watching or crocheting, or fixing cars and cooking. Whatever you enjoy doing, dive on in and destress.
Exercise
While walking is technically a form of exercise, you make want to challenge yourself more mentally and physically by doing some cardio and weight training. Hit the gym, or workout at home with free weights, videos, or fitness apps.
Spend Time With Friends
Spend time with people who make things feel lighter and better. Great friends can truly be a lifesaver in times like these. Have your friends over for dinner, or meet up for a hike or drinks.
Take Time For Yourself
Do something just for yourself, whether that means going to the spa or to the gun range. The simple things in life have been missed lately. Going to get your nails done, going to the gym, or just window shopping feel like activities of the past. Normal is different, so allowing yourself the little treats you can is worth it and will help to reduce your stress.
Spend Some Time Alone
While many of us have been in quarantine during the pandemic, we still may not get any alone time. Time alone with our thoughts or time alone with our hobbies. Close the bedroom door or bathroom and give yourself an hour of alone time. You deserve it.
Declutter Your Life
Believe it or not, clutter can make you feel more stressed and unable to focus. Spend a Saturday decluttering your closet, your bedroom, or your kitchen, and you will reap the benefits. Not only are you getting rid of stuff you no longer use or need, but you can also help others in need by donating your stuff.
Volunteer
Volunteering is a great way to give back to your community, give yourself a purpose, and a way to find appreciation for your life. Whether you choose to volunteer at a hospital, at a retirement home, or at a homeless shelter you are likely to come away from your experience less stressed about your own life.
Get More Sleep
Sometimes managing stress is just a simple matter of getting more sleep. Turn off all of the electronics, put on a sleep mask if needed, and get a good night’s rest. When you wake up in the morning, the world and your life will still be the same, but you will have the energy and the focus to face anything that comes your way.
While we cannot control the world around us, we can do our best to manage and control our response in what often feels like chaotic times. Remember, you got this. You will get through this and things will get better.
Are you feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders? What do you do to destress and clear your mind? Please your share experience and advice!
“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.” - Albert Einstein
5 Signs Your Guy Friend Likes You (And It’s More Than Friendship)
There is a never-ending debate about whether or not men and women can just be friends. Can men and women just be friends without romantic feelings sneaking in for one or both of them? There is no right answer because everyone is different.
Just like people, friendships evolve over time. Some friendships become closer, while other friendships grow apart, and some friends develop romantic feelings for one another and fall in love.
Perhaps you suspect that your guy friend is interested in you romantically, even though he may not have vocalized his love for you. Here’s the thing, he doesn’t need to declare his love for you for his feelings to be obvious. Here are the five signs to looks for if you think your guy friend is romantically interested in you.
5 Signs He’s Romantically Interested In You
He Flirts With You
You are “just friends” with your guy pal, but sometimes when hanging out with him you get flirty vibes. He gives lots of eye contact, sits a little too close, and is very touchy. If hanging out with your guy friend suddenly starts to feel like dates, it may be because he’s romantically interested and trying to date you.
Also depending on how long you have been friends, you may have witnessed his behavior with girlfriends or with girls he liked. Ask yourself if he is displaying the same types of behaviors towards you.
He Always Wants To Hang Out Alone
You and your guy friend are part of a group of friends, but if he suddenly starts suggesting activities for just the two of you, or if he tries to hang back with you after everyone else has departed, you are seeing big signs he is likely romantically interested in you.
Another tactic in this area is inviting you out or over to his house, giving you the impression that others will be there, but it ends up being just the two of you.
He Goes Above and Beyond For You
Friends help each other out, but your guy friend will go above and beyond and do more than you even asked. He will help you move, pick you up from the airport, take care of your dog if you go out of town, and take care of you if you are sick.
The bottom line is he does for you what he doesn’t do for other friends. Maybe you two are just better friends but it may also be because he’s in love with you.
He’s Generous With You
Your guy friend who is romantically interested in you will be very generous with his time and money when it comes to you. Whenever you go two go out together he suddenly starts picking up the tab for everything.
He will also give you the best gifts because of course, he remembers your birthday and wants to make your Christmas extra special. A huge sign he’s interested romantically is receiving a jewelry gift or a very personally meaningful gift from him.
He Jokes About You Two Being A Couple
Saying the things we really want to say while disguising the words as a joke is a passive-aggressive way to express our true feeling. If your guy friend is always joking about how you two are practically a couple, or how everyone thinks you are his girlfriend, it’s his way of trying to put those thoughts in your head and tell you what he really wants.
Whether or not you believe that men and women can just be friends without feelings or sex getting involved, I think many of us have experienced at least one friendship that evolved from friends to more than friends. Once you have confirmation of your guy pal’s feeling you can then make a determination of how you want to move forward.
If you are interested in him as well just go with the flow and spend more one on one time together and allow things to develop organically. But if you are not interested, you can either start dropping hints that you only like him as a friend or you can have “the talk”. If this friendship is important to you, I suggest you tread lightly regardless of how you feel because the future of your friendship could be in jeopardy.
What are your thoughts on recognizing the signs of a guy friend becoming romantically interested in you? What would you do or have done in the past when a guy friend expressed romantic interested in you? Please share your thoughts and experience!
“...I told him a story of two people. Two people who shouldn't have met, and who didn't like each other much when they did, but who found they were the only two people in the world who could possibly have understood each other.” ― Jojo Moyes, Me Before You
Love Languages Explained: How Knowing Yours Can Transform Your Relationship
Every person has their own unique love language. Our individual love language is the basic way we show our romantic love for our partner or potential partner, and also how we perceive reciprocation of that love from our romantic partner.
Love Language is a term coined by author Gary Chapman in his book titled “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate”. The book discusses five general categories of how we express our love and I could not agree more with the categories.
In order to benefit from the language information in your current or future relationships, it is important to recognize how you prefer to give and receive love. I also believe it is important to be matched with a mate whose love language aligns with your own.
The five love languages are words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. As we go through each of love language try to determine which ones you use, and which ones you want to receive in a relationship to feel happy and fulfilled.
By the end of this blog, you should be able to identify your love language, both the way you show love and the way you want to receive love.
The Five Love Languages and How to Determine Your Love Language
Words of Affirmation
Word of affirmation are words of validation and appreciation. Many of us want and need to hear that we are loved and appreciated. We want to hear that we are doing a great job, that we are capable, and that we are enough. These words of affirmation can carry a lot of weight when coming from our partner.
It is also important to take note of how frequently you express words of affirmation to your partner. Are words of affirmation one of the ways you show love?
Acts of Service
Acts of service are about showing your loved one how you feel through your actions. Doing things for your partner or love interest “just because” can often be subtle but one of the sweetest ways to show your love. Simple things such as filling up their gas tank, bringing them lunch, or picking up their dry cleaning are examples of acts of service and doing for them.
Do you expect your partner to do regular acts of service in your relationship, and if they don’t do you think they love you less, or is it not a big deal to you?
Receiving Gifts
Receiving and giving gifts is like giving tokens of love and affection for some. The importance of giving and receiving gifts varies from person to person. Some people love to give gifts to others, especially their mates, but they want very little in return.
While certain individuals don’t expect or want frequent gifts from their partner, for some others, they see a direct correlation between the gifts they receive from their partner and how much they believe their partner cares about them.
Quality Time
Quality time with your partner means giving them your undivided attention. Your time is everything. We never seem to have enough of it, so how much or how little time you expect and make for your partner may be a reflection of your heart but also speaks to your love language.
If you make the time for quality time with your partner and view it as important to do so then quality time is one of your love languages.
Physical Touch
Humans need physical touch, but not all humans desire or are satisfied by the same level of physical touch. While one partner may be perfectly content to just kiss, hold hands, and snuggle the majority of the time, the other partner may feel the need for more sexual intimacy to feel connected and show their love.
Whether you enjoy nightly cuddles or intense rolls in the sack, physical touch can still be your love language, but it is helpful if your partner is fluent in your dialect.
After reading this blog I hope you are now able to identify your love language and your partner’s as well. Knowing both of your love languages will help explain why you are ridiculously happy in your relationship or why you are feeling like something is missing. Remember, we are who we are. We cannot force anyone to change. We either accept them or choose to move on.
What are your thoughts on love languages? Do you recognize your love language? Do you recognize your partner’s love language? Does having this information change anything for you? Please share your thoughts and experience with love languages!
“You cannot force someone to accept an expression of love. You can only offer it. If it is not accepted, you must respect the other person's decision.” ― Gary Chapman
What To Do When You Love Them But Don't See A Future Together?
It sounds crazy to think that you could be in love with someone, madly even perhaps, but you have a nagging feeling telling you that he’s not the one. That feeling takes over and it becomes virtually impossible to see a future with someone you care so much for.
I am all about trusting your gut instincts, but I am also about analyzing and asking why we feel this way. Is it really a gut instinct talking or is there a bias, a judgment, or an unrealistic standard holding you back from finding true love.
When you don’t see a future with someone the right thing to do is to walk away, but before you do, I suggest you ask yourself these questions first.
Questions To Ask Before Walking Away From A Relationship
Am I Embarrassed For People To Meet Him"?
Is he is older or younger than the typical guy you date? Or perhaps a little shorter or balder than you are comfortable with?
You have every right to want a certain type of man, but if any of the above is the reason you do not see a future with them, you are being shallow and may regret your decision to walk away in the long run.
Do I Think He’s Good Enough?
This is a tough question to ask ourselves and even tougher to admit when the answer is negative. Does he come from a poor family or the wrong side of the tracks and this bothers you?
If he is a good man, with a good heart who treats you well, you need to think twice before dismissing him as not being good enough.
Does His Income or Job Matter To Me?
Maybe you need a partner who makes a lot of money or at least more than you do. Sometimes it’s about status or material things, or maybe you are just a traditionalist, but either way, you cannot see yourself with a man who doesn’t make a lot of money or doesn’t make more money than you.
Good, available men are not easy to come by, so you may need to ask yourself what’s more important.
Do We Want Different Things?
They say opposites attract but making it work with someone who views the world differently, and wants different things in life can be challenging and perhaps somewhat disheartening.
If he wants different things, it is not your job to convince him otherwise. And if you are certain of the future you want, or don’t want, that may be a very good reason to walk away.
Will I Be Happier Without Him?
In the beginning, you were all starry-eyed and full of hope of a future together, but as you drifted from cloud nine back down to earth you realized that a future with this man may not make you as happy as you once thought. The masks fell off and you didn’t like what you saw.
There is no judgment here because you have every right to decide what you want and don’t want in a partner. And let’s be honest, only you know deep down inside the real answers to these questions. However, if you are being honest with yourself, you fell in love with this person for a reason, and since they are not a violent, horrible person (otherwise this would be a different conversation), it begs to question what prevents you from seeing a future with them?
Have you ever been in a situation where you love someone but didn’t see a future with them? If so, what did you do? What advice would you give? Please share your thoughts or story!
“Real love" - "This kind of love is emotional in nature but not obsessional. It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth.”
― Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate